It is possible to have an easy menopause?

[OhBeAFineGuyKissMe]

I know on a help board there will be a massive selection effect by people asking for help, but I wondered if there are any stories of people having an easy menopause?

I’m 45 and had some peri symptoms, a couple of night sweats before my period, increased clumsiness, quick to anger/teary. But that all stopped about 6 months ago. My periods just seem to be fading away, last one was only 2 days and barely needed a panty liner.

Could I be one of the luckier ones or are is it waiting around the corner to jump out at my when I least expect it?

My menopause was over 20 years ago so I hope that means I've got away with it. I do have osteoarthritis in my hand but had it before the menopause and it links to an accident 50 years ago, you can see it quite clearly on the xray that it starts with the joints that were injured but it has spread and I think that is because of the way I use my hand to spare the damaged joints. It has been worse since covid, I had terrible joint pain everywhere when Ihad covid and that has gradually gone but the damaged hand is still bad, don't know if it will improve now as it is 10 months, I live in hope.

I'm hoping that's it done.

I think it can work either way, I think this year that has been so much doom and gloom about menopause that I feel sorry for younger women who must think it is inevitable that they are going to have a terrible time but I don't think people's problems should be dismissed either. It is hard to get the balance right.

Absolutely, yes. I was expecting the worst as I'd had an awful puberty, awful periods and PMT and postnatal illness. My hormones were not my friends. At 48 my periods dwindled to every other month x went from 7 days to 2 days, stopped after 2 years. I got a bit absent minded for a year or so, had one winter of hot flashes then, since age 50, I've never felt so great in my life!

I am 44 and it looks like I've been peri menopausal for a few years, though only really started putting 2+2 together this year.

My mum had a hysterectomy young so I had no guide on when to expect mine.

Just to support what @JinglingXmasbells says, I have all of a sudden since the summer, started to leak when I walk and run and have been diagnosed with a quite severe double prolapse recently. This looks like it has been massively exacerbated by hormonal swings and uro-gynae told me HRT is needed (GP had already agreed to this, gynae check was needed first though).

However while I am not debilitated by my menopause symptoms (no hot flushes) and so could claim to be getting an easy ride, actually there is some serious stuff happening to my body and I am just praying I will be able to tolerate the HRT as I think that there are more benefits than just stopping brain fog or urinary incontinence.

Stop, just stop.

Yes well done you, you're amazing 🙄

My last period happened when I was 55 (17 years ago now). I had about two hot flashes during the peri-menopause period, and went through a stage where my periods got closer together and very heavy, but my GP prescribed tranexamic (sp?) acid and that solved that problem. I don't remember having emotional swings I'd attribute to menopause, but my first husband died suddenly just before my 51st birthday and I remarried eighteen months later and emigrated to the US, so I guess my emotions were probably in a degree of upheaval anyway! I don't have osteoporosis - in fact I fell on ice a week ago and banged my hip and sprained my ankle on my way to an existing doctor's appointment, and my doctor informed me that I had aced my osteoporosis test. My UK GP did say to me once that I was not 'the build of woman who gets osteoporosis', by which I think she meant I'm overweight.

I was on the minipill until I was 53. When I came off, the menopause had happened.
I have slept poorly for a few years now and have a bit of mind fog but that is it.

it was the not being able to sleep that was worst for me, now I use an 'erbal sleeping remedy' (with a pungent smell....) and I sleep just fine
#stoner grandma😂

I read about a third of women barely know they've been through the menopause, a third have mild but manageable symptoms and a third have severe symptoms that majorly impact their lives.

I was going to say this too.
As you say in your OP, reading threads or articles about it will give a skewed view - as would reading the Relationships board. People don't tend to post "I'm 51 now and just living my ordinary life", but, for many women, that is how it is.

I haven’t really suffered much. I’m 52. No hot sweats ever, no unmanageable mood swings. Okay, I’ve gained a bit of weight around the waist but that’s middle age for you - I don’t take a bigger dress size. I run a couple of times a week and eat fairly sensibly. Booze takes longer to get over the next day. But I’m not having a nightmare like others I keep reading about.

Most of my friends have hit menopause and bar some hot sweats and mood swings, most of us got through it ok.

If you are looking for stats, go to the BMS or other reputable medical sites.

This is from their website thebms.org.uk/

Core Theme 2: Information and education on women’s health

As referred to above, whilst most women attribute hot flushes and night sweats to the menopause, many do not associate other symptoms such as tiredness, low mood, anxiety, poor memory and concentration or sensation of brain fog to the menopause

As a result, women may fail to understand why they are experiencing them. Menopausal symptoms affect more than 75% of women.

So, whilst not all women going through the menopause will experience menopausal symptoms, the majority will and over 25% describe severe symptoms.

Menopausal symptoms may last for a long time with an average duration of 7 years, and 1 in 3 women[30 per cent] experience symptoms beyond the 7 years.

I had a very easy menopause. My periods just got lighter and lighter and further apart. I got the odd hot flush at night but no tears, anger or mood swings. It was fine.

I guess my problem with attributing every instance of tiredness, low mood, anxiety, poor memory and concentration or sensation of brain fog to the menopause is that... menopause is not the cause of those symptoms in every individual. Especially if the individual is male or pre-menopausal female, but fundamentally, those symptoms sometimes happen for other reasons that have nothing to do with menop.

I'm all for people using modern medicine to improve their lives, that also means being open-minded about true causes. Also, it is bad thing to go all doom & gloom about one's health prospects. People can talk themselves into having symptoms like above if they think they are inevitable.

I guess my problem with attributing every instance of tiredness, low mood, anxiety, poor memory and concentration or sensation of brain fog to the menopause is that... menopause is not the cause of those symptoms in every individual.

I'm with you there. I've had major bouts of insomnia at various points since I was at school. It's my go-to reaction to the slightest hint of stress. It might be that insomnia now is down to peri, but it might just be me and work and other stuffing crap. And lack of sleep is a direct cause of tiredness, low mood, poor memory, lack of concentration, brain fog, etc. Life is always easier to manage if you manage to get good sleep. I'm not saying it isn't because of menopause - my hormones have sent my sex drive stratospheric lately (which is shite, as I'm single,) so there are things going on, but no guarantee it is the cause of my bad sleep. I doubt there's anyway of being certain either way, unless taking HRT just stops the symptoms, and suddenly I sleep well ever after, but nothing is affecting me enough that I can be bothered to make an appointment currently.

Some minor symptoms but nothing for long and nothing I needed medicating for beyond a paracetamol or two.

Easy peasy. Easily menopause at 44, nothing interesting to note. Same for my mum and both sisters.

@silverclock222 Easy doesn't equal safe.

Your menopause was 7 years earlier than the average and puts you at a higher risk of osteoporosis, heart disease and dementia.

Please do consider a bone density scan if your family has osteoporosis, a history of heart disease or dementia.

As I have said many times on her (and I know some posters will be fed up with me saying it) I have two friends who has 'easy' menopauses. One has the bones now of a woman aged 90 and 2 fractures in her back, by the age of 55, and the other had a broken leg in her late 40s after a minor fall.

I'll keep saying this even if it's only to stop one woman ending up disabled, and in pain, and on strong meds with side effects.

It can also mean other issues are missed. A few years, 4 or 5, after my menopause I got incredibly tired, put weight on and life was just too much. Doctor kept saying I was depressed, normal at my age etc. It was an underactive thyroid and it was the practice nurse who realised what it was and did a blood test.

My results were so bad that the hospital phoned the surgery first thing the next morning and I got a phone call saying doctor needed to see me urgently. His first comment after telling me what was wrong was, "It must have been awful, you must have felt like you were swimming through treacle." No shit Sherlock, I'd been telling you that for the last 2 years. I had to be weaned on to the right dose of thyroxine and it took a few months to get there but within a week of the low dose I felt so much better.

So just because you are in the age range for menopause doesn't mean everything is menopause.

53 years old here, thought I was getting through it lightly with just hot sweats. The hot sweats stopped a couple of weeks ago, it had been over 8 months since my last period, I was thinking "Woohoo, I'm done!" Period arrived two days ago. Bugger. Am hoping this is the one final period about a year on that others have spoken of.

I started having menopausal symptoms at 35; I’m 50 now and it’s been 6 months since there was any bleeding (my last period started the day I was diagnosed with diabetes - and exactly 1 month after my Dad had died with diabetes on his death certificate (!) - so the date is firmly lodged in my brain 😂). I actually got to 11 1/2 months of no period a couple of years ago and boom, Christmas Eve & the gates of hell opened!

Being serious, I haven’t had any flooding, my Mum said she’d stopped & her bleeding started again so heavily she dreaded going out & about. I’m hoping I don’t get to that point, so far so good (much less blessing than when I had an IUD).

One strange occurrence was passing the oddest, dry clots, about the size of a garden pea (and a few that were more petit pois sized).

I take a lot of pain relief (opiates & pregabalin) as I already had wonky spine; scoliosis, degenerative disc disease at 19/20, a type of spina bifida, osteoarthritis - lots of micro fractures & bone spurs - and now I make giant synovial cysts (L2-3, and one around L4-5 I discovered when I put my hand on my back when I was browsing the office chairs in IKEA last month 🤣). An increase in pain levels I tend to attribute to that rather than the menopause, although it has got worse over the same interval. Of course, correlation isn’t always cause.

I take a good multivitamin & extra b supplements (recommended by my diabetes nurse), and I’ve found my hot flushes are now lessened, but again, that may just be the stage of menopause I’m at rather than the supplements helping. I can’t take HRT because of familial risks (breast cancer, strokes etc.) so it hasn’t been the easiest at times.

The thing that’s kept me going is just thinking of the time I don’t have to worry about the extra pain of periods (proper go green & pass out pain levels), not paying a fortune in period products any more, and not having to stand in a meeting & having to excuse myself (luckily they were good friends as well as business clients) with the phrase,
”Please excuse me, I think I’ve inked myself.”

My mum is 70 next year and hasn't t even mentioned it once.

Doesn't really mean anything though. My mother is a bit older but simply does not communicate about those sort of things. Ever. As a child approaching puberty I was given a book to read rather than her having to discuss periods. It is simply a taboo subject.

I have no idea when she hit menopause and whether or not she suffered. It's really only been in the last 5 years that menopause has been a topic often discussed in the media.

@CharityShopChic she usually would mention it, as she has health anxiety. Not that she will
Admit it.