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Menopause

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Perimenopause - brainfog - confusion - now unemployed :(

10 replies

Londondreamer · 09/11/2022 10:07

Hi everyone, I hope you don't mind a bit of a vent and a blub! Hopefully you may be able to offer some advise, as I feel I'm drowning.

I was made redundant last year and wasn't too worried, as I was very confident in my abilities and in myself, so was sure I'd find something else, which I did in a few weeks.

I'm 52 and had regular periods up to that point, knew I must be nearing menopause but didn't give it much thought to be honest. I started my new job and almost within weeks, found my concentration was dipping. Having to ask to be shown simple things over and over again, not being able to retain information. Then anxiety kicked in not surprisingly. At the same time, my period started not to turn up when expected and I had crippling PMT until it did. I stayed in that job for a few months and it was awful. I couldn't get to grips with what was being asked of me, they were becoming impatient with me understandably but i still didn't put 2 and 2 together. I was then offered another job, which seemed more like my old job and i thought, Maybe I'd be better suited there, so resigned and moved.
I started my new job and the physical symptoms started getting more severe. Very irregular periods, painful cramps up until they arrived, IBS like stomach issues again which disappeared when my period came. And the same thing happened, I just couldn't learn the new job role, silly mistakes, not understanding tasks. Trying to manage regular anxiety attacks whilst feeling physically, pretty rough most of the time.
Not surprisingly, after one mistake too many, they let me go and I am now job less. I don't blame them in anyway because I had become more of a liability then a useful employee.
What is has done, is make me take a breath and actually look at what has been happening to me. I was trying so hard to keep going, to try and get through the days, I didn't have the head space . My confidence is now through the floor. I need to work to provide for myself and my family, but I know, if I don't get myself sorted, the same thing will happen again.
I'm making an appointment with my GP to look into HRT etc and hopefully get on track again and move forward. I think I was so comfortable in my old job and knew it so well, that maybe it masked a lot of the psychological symptoms and I didn't realise until I actually had to start learning things again.

Sorry for the long post, needed to vent a little and it has helped, as I struggle to put into words how I feel.

Much love to all of us going through this, I never knew it could be this hard X

OP posts:
ByeByeMr · 09/11/2022 10:11

Would you consider going back to your old job? Is that a possibility?

Abra1t · 09/11/2022 10:13

HRT has helped my brain fog, which seriously hindered my work before.

Londondreamer · 09/11/2022 10:20

ByeByeMr · 09/11/2022 10:11

Would you consider going back to your old job? Is that a possibility?

I still have friends there who know how I am at the moment and are sympathetic. I think I would and I'd like to think if the company was in a position to re hire me, they would consider it.

OP posts:
Londondreamer · 09/11/2022 10:27

Abra1t · 09/11/2022 10:13

HRT has helped my brain fog, which seriously hindered my work before.

I'm hoping it will. I can't even imagine going through the interview process at the moment, never mind starting in a new job again. I feel like I've lost myself.

OP posts:
stickygotstuck · 09/11/2022 10:27

I don't really have much advice. Just stated HRT and it's too early to tell whether it's making a difference yet, but my main reason to start was brain fog & lack of sleep.

I think I was so comfortable in my old job and knew it so well, that maybe it masked a lot of the psychological symptoms and I didn't realise until I actually had to start learning things again

This rings very true. I feel the same - learning new stuff is hard now, which I hate and goes against my very nature.

HRT would be my first port of call in your plase. Good luck with the GP.

emmahearts · 23/09/2023 09:41

I’m not working due to perimenopause symptoms. I’ve tried HRT for 4 months but felt no different so I stopped it. It was the gel.
Everyday I have different symptoms. They are all debilitating. I wondered if maybe I should take vitamins. Do I take a multi vitamin or all separate ones? I feel the doctors don’t know what to do anymore. I’ve had everything checked.
I get menstrual migraines, exhaustion and feeling completely drained, aches in lower back and hips, tingling in my private area, shaking uncontrollably, feeling weak and tearful. This is everyday and I need to go back to work to get money.
please help.

JinglingSpringbells · 23/09/2023 10:10

@emmahearts You sound in a bad way. Can I ask a few things?

After you tried Oestrogel for 4 months and didn't feel better, what happened then?

Did you discuss this with your doctor?
or did you decide to stop without talking it over?

3 months is the minimum for HRT to see how it's helping- or not.
At 3 months ( or maybe 4) if it's not helping, the rule is to assess the dose and the type.

Did you discuss this and maybe agree to increase your dose?
The starting dose is 2 pumps but you can go to 3 (and see if that helps) and then 4 if needed. Each increase needs a couple of weeks or more to see if it helps.

Also, how much Utrogestan were you using?

If , after experimenting with gel, it's still not helping, the next step would be to try patches or a tablet form like Femoston.

You need to consider going through a bit of trial and error.

emmahearts · 23/09/2023 11:15

Hi jinglingspringbells. What a great name. I told my doctor that I wasn’t feeling any benefit. I also suffer with depression and anxiety, and she thinks it’s probably that, but I don’t know. I feel different to normal. I don’t get hot flushes, and I have regular periods. My doctor isn’t very knowledgeable about menopause and is younger than me. I only took 2 pumps a day. One in the morning and one at night. I have the mirena coil that is providing the progesterone side of it. I’m 51 now and have been suffering a few years now. I started getting menstrual migraine at 43, then as I got to 48, that’s when things went more downhill. I don’t ever have a good full day. As I said, I need to get a job but don’t think I would be able to hold on to it.
Do you know much about vitamins?
Thank you for reading this and trying to help me

JinglingSpringbells · 23/09/2023 14:06

@emmahearts happy to try to help:)

The medical advice with gel (which is easy to adjust yourself) is to increase it and see if that relieves symptoms.
2 is the starting dose for most women and works for many.
However, some need 3 pumps and some 4.

I'd go back onto it, start with 2 pumps for a couple of weeks then increase to 3 for a few weeks to see how oyu feel.

Vitamins- waste of money. Unless you have a restricted diet, they don't do anything. Whatever you get in excess of daily requirements, are excreted so straight down the pan! Vitamins don't 'cure' menopause symptoms, but you do need to eat healthily with as many fruit and veg a day as you can, as well as cutting out most refined and sugary foods and drinks.

emmahearts · 23/09/2023 20:07

Thank you so much for all your advice. I will go back on it and try what you said. I’ll let you know how I get on

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