I don't know who I am any more

[LostInPace]

I'm really struggling with peri to the point I've lost my sense of self. I don't know how else to phrase it. I had a huge mass on my ovary that twisted so got that and my tube removed, then some polyps. After that I got a mirena because my bleeding was still so bad but honestly I feel like I'm losing my mind with it. I felt a change in my personality as soon as it went in, got suicidal (apologies for triggering), never felt that rage before. I went to the GP who gave me hrt and that helped up to about last year but really I've been rocky these past twelve months. I've kept it in all this time hoping I could control it doing yoga running etc, but I feel so angry and sad and I can't sleep, I only sleep about four hours a night, I can't stand this.

I put in an online form to my GP two weeks ago saying I wanted the coil out, I got a text back saying they would review my request for care in 28 days but honestly I am losing my mind. I need this thing out of me, it is making me crazy and aggressive. I don't even care about heavy bleeding any more, I just have to get it out.

Has anyone had anything similar? Can you take it out yourself? I cannot go on like this.

I'm so sorry to hear you feeling like this . As someone who is going through menopause too I can fully empathise. Is it affordable to try and seek out one private appointment to get the coil removed rather than wait ?

Also four hours sleep a night is going to make you feel miserable too . I take magnesium just before bed and try and do yoga or Pilates every day to help .. and it really really does .. just calms everything and I get a free shot of endorphins which has been amazing .

Thank you so much for replying.

I do take magnesium every day, also do yoga and run. But I cannot take this rage out of me. It has been there since I got the mirena. I am worried that I am going to hurt someone. I just feel so angry all the time.

You aren't alone .. it's awful I know and can just get in the way of life and living .. if you can afford it I would see if you can get a private appt .. just one.. and get it sorted .. I'm sorry it's so tough at the moment ..

I have the Mirena and it works for me but I am one of the lucky ones. Although inserting the last time was horrific to say the least. Saying that I have read that a lot of people react to it in the way you describe. If you can at all go private it will be worth it. You really need this out asap and your specialist will discuss what you need to replace the Mirena. I wouldn't recommend removing it yourself. It sounds like you're quite proactive in looking after yourself. I also wonder would talk therapy help. Sometimes off loading all that rage can help. They can also help in suggesting ways to wind down during the day and before sleep. Have you reduced your caffeine intake?

@doubleshotcappuccino how much magnesium do you take before bed please?

Mmmm, I think I'm in a similar situation. My mirena went in 3 months ago, but not sure it's helping my moods at all. I was hoping to persevere for 6 months but not sure I can.

I had the Mirena years ago (long before peri-menopause) and it turned me into a different person. Really horrible rage. The GP claimed it couldn't be due to the Mirena, but I went back to normal once it was out.

Perhaps you need more oestrogen? Are you on a gel? Could you increase the dose?

It is very quick and easy to get the coil out (I'm not suggesting you do it yourself) so it's really frustrating that they're are making you wait 28 days.

Have you told them that you have had suicidal thoughts?

@RudsyFarmer 400mg .. I like the biolectra brand of tablet 20 mins before bed .. but I think any tablet form is fine - it's been transformative for me generally and sleep quality