Brain fog and tiredness: I have no idea how to do my job or think or make decisions.

[CatNamedEaster]

I'm knackered (I have phases of 6-7 hours sleep but currently in a phase of 3-4am wake up, today was a record at 2.30am).

I have no idea how to actually work today. I can't think about how to solve any problems, can't think of how to respond to shitty PA messages without being rude so I'm ignoring them, have achieved nothing so far.

Is this brain fog? I'm usually great at technical solutions but can't even work out how to put a spreadsheet together today.

Hopefully starting HRT soon once I get blood test results to also check for thyroid and diabetes.

Also had a shit weekend where I burned dinner and ended up arguing with DH in front of DS using "fucking" and "piss off" before storming out. So not only can I not even do my job I also feel like I'm doing so much damage to my relationship as even if DH is in the wrong it's me that comes out as the bad guy because my reactions are so awful.

Not sure what I'm asking really. Does this sound off the scale and not just menopause or can it really be this bad before getting help?

I suppose I'm thinking is this 'just' peri-menopause or am I just a total shit?

I was listening to the radio earlier and realised my DH or DS would never write in with a message for me because I'm so horrible. It's not a pity party, it feels like the basic fact of the matter.

I am exactly the same with the hideous irrational swear-filled outbursts and I have two absolutely well behaved children (albeit my son is incredibly loud); but if they bicker even once when I have PMT, I flip out and then immediately regret it. At all other times we have a wonderful relationship, so they must be so confused.

I’m only 37, but my mum went through menopause early and I have other peri menopausal symptoms. I have no advice, but please know you are not alone.

Yes I think that's it. The inconsistency. DS is awaiting assessment for autism and I am constantly second guessing the best way to work around his moods, anxieties etc so will often have the patience of a saint and feel great about some sort of issue being resolved...but then another time I'll end up shouting because he picks me up on getting a word wrong or misquoting something when he's trying to argue with me.

I literally feel like I'm abusing them. The shame I feel after yesterday makes me want to walk out.

My DH has previously said "but once you are on HRT...." as if it will cure everything.

I get brain fog all the time. Memory and concentration issues since my periods stopped. Apparently B6 can help I tried it but started getting headaches as a sideeffect so I stopped taking them. However will start taking them again as have increased my daily magnesium dose

For me it’s not being able to remember simple words, and absolutely forgetting things I’ve done.

Yes I totally relate to the spreadsheet thing!
Suggest you get a referral to Occupational health at work You may need some work place adjustments like a desk fan, sit by a window work from home etc

Oh god yes, OP. This was me. HRT (gel plus micronised progesterone) has made a great difference. It has stilled the turbulence and helped massively with other symptoms.

I’ve not had the brain fog but definitely get the rages. I’m nearly 41 and it’s been going on for a few years.

I’ve just bought Dr Louise Newson’s book and have been reading her blogs/listening to her podcast.

You sound like me in my 40s I was permanently angry and tired. I must have been a horrible Mum. I wish I had realised it was peri menopause and got help sooner. Now I'm post menopausal and so much more mellow but I have aches and pains and joint issues. Menopause really is the gift that keeps on giving. I'd ask for a referral to a menopause clinic and don't feel bad about taking time to relax, do yoga, nap, or whatever. Your body is going through a lot.

Insomnia was the 'symptom' that made me start HRT. I'd always been open to it, but was managing peri menopause with exercise, supplements etc.

I made sure that my mammogram, bloods, cervical screening etc were up to date and called the GP as soon as the insomnia became unmanageable.

It has helped lots. In the meantime, do anything you can to lighten your load.

Hi I am the same brain fog makes me forget name have zero recall ability and causes me stress as I have no confidence in my ability to make decisions. Apparently it does get better I just like to know when.

Iv only flicked through this quickly to see if anyone has suggested CBD oil- absolute life saver for brain fog and such, the gummies are v good. Have a read up and defo worth A try xx defo massive improvement here x

@Sayitisnotso

How so with the CBD oil etc, what do you take and what does it do?

@CatNamedEaster please try Magnesium Glycinate for sleep and Magnesium Citrate for gut health.

Menopause the gift that keeps giving and giving and giving ... 🙄

I have significant memory problems with peri menopause- when it's at its worst I have to set reminders every time I put something in the oven or on the stove or else everything burns, I can't remember what another person has said 5 minutes ago in a conversation, so I'll have work meetings and agree to stuff then completely forget about it (even if I write it down). Have started hrt but been warned it doesn't help memory issues and brain fog. I hope they are wrong !

I have this, and menopausal. Now I am getting over Covid which is making it 10x worse, and feeling really anxious at the moment too.

@CollagenLady was recommended to me and I researched throughly beforehand- Google it and the impact on brain fog and brain - it’s interesting. Lots of ways to take it but I find the gummies easy. I use canax branded ones but I’m sure all similar.x

Also magnesium for sleep also helps well, I use a spray as find it helpful for the dreaded restful legs!

Ah I'm the same, it's so stressful and upsetting. I'm losing confidence by the day and no one in work and s going to buoy it up. I'm not sure if it's long covid or peri since I'm only just turning 40. Waiting for the big day so I can go to the GP and petition for hrt following the nice guidelines. Happy birthday eh 😂

@Sayitisnotso

Thank you! I can white knuckle ride the rest but this part does my head in!!

Sorry I hadn't come back to this.
My manager at work is great but the reality is that our line of work has become twice as busy and more complex due to covid so even without all this it would be impossible to manage. I'm lucky that I WFH anyway as I think if I had people peering over my shoulder I'd have been pushed out by now.

I've had blood tests and general health check just so GO can gauge my general state of health so I'm just waiting for a follow up to get started on what she thinks will be most appropriate.

I think I need to pay for a thyroid test though as the GP one was only for TSH and apparently you really need to get T1-T4 tested too to get the full picture (and the TSH result although within the 'normal' range is just outside the 'optimum' range).

Thanks for all the input. I'll take a look at the recommendations for supplements.

Bizarrely, or not, after crying non-stop for most of Monday and half of Tuesday, a switch flicked, I felt instantly clearer and half an hour later my period started (first one in 3 months). It's kind of incredible the effect those hormones can have from minute to minute.

Hopefully my appt won't be too long and my journey back to sanity can start.

@halfsiesonapotnoodle I think that's the combination that she was talking about me starting on so it will be great if it does improve things. She asked what the worst aspect was and I said sleep because it feels like everything else would be easier/more bearable if I get more sleep.

@tinkywinkyshandbag yes I was thinking about various relaxation ideas. I'd like to give myself 20-30 mins every day for something whether it's yoga, art, gardening, so I know I'll have that chance to reset and think of nothing. I think that will really help.

I'll check out Louise Newson's blogs too. I have Maisie Hill's Perimenopause Power which is really useful with tons of practical advice....i just need to keep going through it and adding to my notes so that the info actually goes in.

I’m the same, when I’m in thickest of it I feel suicidal. A few days later I’m better. What helps is being open with those around you, I tell my husband,” today I feel awful “ often before I’ve even got out of bed. I find if the kids are pre warned daily( we rate out of 10) we can all laugh and cope better, I tell them it’s like being a teenager again!!

Yes it's ironic really, when I had the initial chat with the GP she asked if I'd been having any thoughts about harming myself and I said no as I'd procrastinate too much to do anything about it, to try and be light hearted. At the time that was true but this week I have never felt closer to thinking I was completely lost and that it would be better if I wasn't in anyone's lives (in more of a walking out way rather than suicidal way, I think, but still an extremely shocking and scary few days).

I like the idea of a rating system first thing in the morning and it's easy isn't it. No matter how much I try to pretend otherwise, being awake from 3 or 4am is never going to lead to a day of joyful spontaneity .

Hopefully after your blood results, things will start to improve

I would be lost without my Vogel Menopause Support supplements. Loathe to take HRT as stroke history both parents had major ones.