I going to be 40 soon, have a family history of early menopause. Around 4 years ago my periods stopped, despite being in the contraceptive pill which I assumed would always provide a “period” due to how it works. I continued to take the pill as advised by GP who put it down to life issues, etc though I didn’t feel this was accurate at the time. I had been through much worse and always had my period throughout. Anyway, I went 10 months without a period, it then came back for a few months and stopped again for 5/6 months. Since then, it’s come back and continued as “normal”.
However, I now have other “symptoms” and not sure if this is peri menopause, depression or just dealing with life in general.
I have horrendous brain fog and memory lapses, I was always really on the ball and now I find myself doing stupid things like booking a restaurant for the wrong day or taking a wrong turn when following directions and getting lost. I find it really difficult to concentrate on anything, my mind constantly wanders. I have severe knee pain (though also have family history of arthritis so treating for this also).
I am permanently exhausted despite exercising regularly, walking at least 10,000 steps a day, leaving the home for work, etc (I did wonder for a while if WFH was playing a part in my this). I took a day to myself last week, tuning into a box set after the school run and taking it easy. I fell asleep 3 times within a 5 hour period despite sleeping pretty well the night before. I am now also fairly regularly waking at 2/3
I am a healthy bmi but feel my tummy is huge and despite exercise and previous weight loss to the lower end of my “healthy bmi range” it still won’t go away.
I feel like I am hyper sensitive when it comes to social situations. I’ve always been a bit “in tune” if that makes sense, I’m that friend who will message you and somehow know you’re feeling a bit shit. I’m always there for everyone, I’m the person people come to and the person people rely on to help out in a crisis. You’ll see this one coming… no one is there for me, no one responds to a message without hours or days of leaving it read (unless they need something), no one bites my hand off at the suggestion of meeting up. I even sent a card to a friend recently to wish her well in something she had achieved and she didn’t bother to even send a message to say thank you, I had driven 30 mins to drop it through her door. She would know this as there was no stamp/address on it. I know she received it as she mentioned it weeks later in company.
I’ve got to the point I’ve taken read receipts off my phone as it was really getting to me that people were reading messages and ignoring me. Yes, people are busy but not all people, all the time, especially when it is people who ordinarily have their phone to hand when you see them.
I know I’m reading too much into many things but these things go on a loop for me. I remember being told menopause made you feel like a hermit, I am at the point where I just want to hide away as it feel safer than being rejected. And also it can make you feel invisible which I definitely do.
I am starting to wonder if what I portray in the outside is the polar opposite to what I feel inside, though I don’t feel that way.
Would this be part of peri or is there depression in there? I don’t know… I have found myself wondering if I should see doc and ask for antidepressants in the hope this turns off some of the “noise” in my head. I’ve never taken them before so don’t even know if this would be the effect they would have.
If you have read this far, thank you. Sorry for the ramble! Just spinning in circles at the moment.