Peri-meno or PMT?

[actiongirl1978]

Yesterday I found myself sobbing on my dog walk - the dog tripped me over on the long line, I got a rope burn from it and then the puppy jumped on another dog. And then shortly after I had him under control and I got stung by something while some other dog walkers walked past and it was the absolute end, I stood on a bridleway and sobbed and sobbed.

I spent the rest of the day on the edge of tears.

I spent the day wanting to abandon the puppy, leave my husband and I was vile to my poor DC when he was mithering me.

I am 43, have the thing where I can't remember words, have stabbing rage about 10 days before period and am so short with people sometimes.

Am I just an angry person or terrible pmt or peri menopause?

I can't take the pill as it makes me sob and think bad thoughts. So I'm pretty sensitive to hormonal changes.

I bought some agnus castus today in the hope it might help. Evening primrose made no difference.

I've woken up today and nearly cried again.

I'd love anyone's thoughts on this.

Menopause or something else?

I've just turned 40 and have been on hrt for just over a month and a half. It has changed my life. I don't think I had realised how delicate my moods were and I felt I could experience the whole range of negative moods but never the whole range of positive moods if that makes sense.
I have experienced so many more happy emotions in past few weeks!
I was also getting hot at night, awful neck pain, fatigue etc so had a range of symptoms but the negative emotions were definitely my first signs.

Also I struggled with contraceptive pills in the past, feel like I tried them all and all affected my moods. But hrt has felt very different..

Thanks for your reply @BettyWahair what prompted you to decide it was HRT and not just dreadful pmt?

Until I got covid last month, I'm quite fit, loads of dog walking and hiit and running. I also usually eat really well, only decaf coffee, loads of fruit and veg and fish, generally not much alcohol. So I do all the right things. I just think my pmt is getting worse and worse. I know my DH agrees, though he is quite stiff upper lip abput emotional stuff and I can't discuss this with him.

I cried just now at the state of the garden. And just felt so unbelievably overwhelmed with everything. All the stuff.

My GP who is lovely did offer me anti depressants in my late 30s when I told her how bad my pmt felt, but I am already asthmatic and didn't want to have to take anything else.

But I reckon HRT might feel different

A family friend is a menopause specialist so that helped! My PMT was lasting longer and longer until it took over most of the month.
I was still undecided as felt so young but the Dr said that I was borderline PMT/peri and to try for 3 months to see if helped.
I am on Oestrogel gel and 2 weeks of progesterone tablets. First few weeks felt no improvement but then slowly felt better each day!

@BettyWahair thanks so much for your input.

I just threw the hoover down I was so cross with the fact that my husband did no cleaning while I was ill - despite the fact that the only time he has ever cleaned in our 18 yrs together was when I was in hospital with DD 13years ago.

I feel so irrational.

Have a look at the Menopause Doctor website and the balance app.
My irritability and anxiety were sky high and I had never had it before, so I questioned why it was just getting worse and worse. I felt like a shadow of who I used to be and just wasn't getting much out of life.
My GP recommended (pushed) antidepressants but I really didn't want to go down that route.
See if your GP will give you a trial.
Let me know how you get on...

@BettyWahair thanks so so much

Ive had bad PMT since I had my kids ten years ago snd it's got much worse over the years. I was prescribed citalipram which initially worked, but doesn't touch the sides now. I'm now 48 and feel shit most of the month now.

I started oestrogel a week ago (I should have waited until day 1 of period but was desperate) and yesterday was the day before my period. This is the point where I'd normally be at my worst. It was also a difficult day as I had to visit a young person in a hospice. But I weirdly felt stable and was able to cope and was absolutely clear headed. I don't know if it's placebo as I've only been taking it a week but I swear, I already feel different and like I did before being hijacked by hormonal upheaval.

I feel I should have put my debilitating PMT down to peri much earlier.

Lots of luck to you.

@izzy2076 thank you so much for sharing your experience with me.

The more I think about it the more I'm inclined to speak to a Dr.

I am one of the younger mums and this is a topic which is widely discussed but I had assumed not valid for me yet

But I am going to start accumulating information and do something about it.

Sympathy OP . I felt the same as you about a year ago and posted a very long thread on here. I got really good advice. It's worth doing your own research before seeing a GP as they're often not that well informed about perimenopause or pmt. It's good to go armed with info.
Someone on here suggested I look at a pill called Qlaira which acts in a similar way to HRT and is meant to be good for women with pmt/peri symptoms. I did some research and found that Dr Nick Panay recommends qlaira for women in their 40s at his PMT clinic.
I had to convince the GP (it's pricey and she wasn't familiar with it) but eventually she prescribed it and it's been great. All the terrible pmt symptoms have gone, my periods last 3 days and are light and pain free, and it's also a contraceptive.
Overall I'm really happy with it. I know you said you haven't got on well with the pill in the past but they're all so different, it might be worth looking into.
I hope you find a solution that works for you.