Depressed or my relationship... I need help

[Ilovetheseventies]

I don't understand what's happening. I love my DP and were getting on well enough. I just felt I couldn't be in the relationship and we split up but I felt terrible and tbh heart broken it was like someone else had made the decision for me. I wasn't eating much I was just so miserable
We both realised we needed to sort a few things out as due to lockdown and to try again.
We haven't spent much time with each other recently. He has realised he needs to do a few things differently. So we talked yesterday and now I have this feeling again of dread.
So either I don't want this relationship or I'm depressed. I really don't know.
I'm supposed to be seeing the mental health nurse who deals with the menopause in two weeks time. I really am at a loss.

@Ilovetheseventies

Do you know what’s driving the feeling of dread?
What specifically is upsetting you about him?

And sorry to hear you are unhappy.

It feels a little as if it's too late to change anything. I get a terrible feeling as if it's all hopeless.
We weren't really seeing much of each other either. Whilst I'm on my own I'm worrying about it constantly.

@Ilovetheseventies

Oh well fretting that mush is not good.
You need to relax your mind
Start writing a list so you won’t forgot .
Do columns for what wrong what needs to change why that would be better.

Then you will know you won’t forget and you will be able to relax

Will you try?