Going out of my mind!!

[BooseysMom]

Hi, i'm 47 and have regular periods but 2 weeks of every month i feel deliriously up and down, my mood changes every few minutes even! I'm due to bleed in 5 days and my face, esp my nose, has come out in red blotchy scabs! Not a good look! It itches and i feel utterly miserable. DH being a total dick..just shrugs off all my comments..doesn't give a shit basically as long as i look after DS who is 6. I really feel like i don't want to be here. The only place i feel ok is at work, home is crap. I dread coming home, dread Xmas cos it will be the whole "oh aren't we all jolly" family thing again. I have raging palpitations, insomnia, stress symptoms and on and off cramps most of the month now.
Is anyone else feeling this way?
And can anyone recommend a face cream for this skin prob i've got? It has to be around the fiver or under mark. I've always used Avon 35+ cream but this might be making it worse.
Thanks for reading x

@Orangeblossom78..Def with you on the avoidance technique! . Xmas is unfortunately one of those times i can't use it but this time i have planned ahead and thought of some good come backs! I'm going to need wine to assist me

Yes I know, we have visiting relatives before and after, and also with Dh's family over the break. Not easy, and not looking forward to it.

Have started taking Monospace and also a tablet of something called Menopause support. Soya isoflavones. Think I feel a bit less tearful and emotional but not sure if it has time to work yet, and is mid cycle so will see.

Yes sometimes have to just grin and bear it for a bit with these relatives I guess.

@Orangeblossom78..that sounds like a lot to suffer with! I'm lucky as it's just for Xmas day. Good luck with the tablets. I hope they work for you. Report back if you like. I'll be following if they do!

Look up Dr Louise Newson, she's a menopause specialist Dr, and she's a huge advocate of HRT. Good luck x x

@MayMiracle.. that's great, thank you. I will look her up.
In the case of my DM who had breast cancer at 60, they gave her tamoxifen which sent her crazy mood-wise. So i was always against anything that messed with your hormones..birth control and hrt. They said her cancer wasn't menopause related but i don't know how they can know that

OP most breast cancers are not inherited and it's actually only a small number of people who have an increased risk of breast cancer because of their family history. I'm sorry you lost your mum at 60 but this isn't considered 'young' for breast cancer and wouldn't put you in a risk category. So please go speak to your GP about HRT as it sounds like it might really help you get through this difficult time.

I'm 49, peri-menopausal and I am high risk for breast cancer (due to several close family members dying young from it - including my mother who died at 51 after fighting breast cancer for over a decade). So I'm not allowed HRT. I take Tamoxifen (as part of a breast cancer prevention 'trial' under the supervision of a geneticist at the high risk breast cancer clinic at one of the London hospitals). The side effects of Tamoxifen are nasty and it definitely makes me (even more) irritable so combine that with peri-menopause and I really should be the evil psycho devil bitch that no-one wants around. I admit that I have my moments.

But actually, I manage my mood pretty well. Exercise is an absolute MUST for my mental health. I'm at the gym almost every day, even those days when I just want to hide under the duvet and cry. I know I will feel better if I exercise - and see my friends at the gym who keep me motivated/make fun of me/make me laugh/buy me lunch when I'm really struggling with my mood. So I drag myself there.

I also get out every day and do some walking in the local parks. Rain, snow, cold, I'm still out there walking. I walk up to 10km and I always make sure I stop and appreciate the joy of nature. It's the little things you need to seek pleasure in and appreciate. It will help your mood so much. Find those small things that make you joyful. I feed the squirrels in the park (they know me so well that some of them jump straight onto my lap). I watch the various ducks and geese raise their families. I stop off for a coffee (or mulled wine) at the park cafe. I pop into the local independent shops to buy a snack or treat to take home. These are all little things but the combination improves my mood so much and suddenly I don't feel so bad. Exercise, animals, nature and good food/coffee works for me. You need to find those little things that lift your mood (maybe it's reading a certain author, or listening to certain music, etc) and incorporate them into your daily life. Do it every day and it will help I promise.

Hi OP.I would check out the possibility of roseacea.I had red angry skin on my face in my 30s/40s that I was given cream for but it worsened.When the GP said I had rosacea which seemed worse under stress of in cold weather I was given a medicated gel that sorted it out.
I am on HRT now with no skin issues.

Re the PP upthread who was given setraline. I'm glad it's working for you, but you might want to note that current NICE guidelines are that HRT should be used as the first line of treatment for menopausal symptoms, not anti-deppressants. The Menopause Matters site has a link to the NICE guidelines, or you can find them via the NHS website.

@8HundredMilesAnHour.. thank you so much for posting with your experience and advice. I'm really sorry to hear of the breast cancer link in your family. I remember well DM taking Tamoxifen too and she also had v.bad side-effects and they told her to stop taking it.
You sound like you're in a good place now and have to agree you are exactly right about the little things in life bringing happiness. My DM used to say this and she gave me a plaque which said 'take time to love the little things'.
The only thing i'm very bad at is exercise. I need to get back into it.
I wish you all the best x

@whatisforteamum.. thank you for your advice about skin probs. Well it seems to have gone away now that my period is here so it's just the run-up to it that it flares up.
Good to hear your skin is ok now and that hrt is working. I need to get it too!