Adult girl gang !?

[handbaglove]

How on earth do you made friends as adults?!

im fresh out of a marriage have 2 teenage children and all of my friends are at different stages of their lives which worked absolutely fine when i was playing the good wife but now im sat home on my weekends when the children are at their dads with nothing to do and nowhere to go!

I remember this place being a place of solace when my children were little and I’d chatter away with other mums in the same situation but now im finding my children are older, I’m older - how do you meet new people without seeming like a weirdo?!

When my marriage broke firm I joined a hobby. It helped me make lots of new friends.
Unfortunately it is on one evening a week which only really works with older kids/teens

I’ve joined the gym but everyone is in their own world. I’m struggling with the isolation massively. I know I should learn to enjoy my own company but I don’t want to go out for a glass of wine by myself like billy no mates 🤦🏼‍♀️

What type of gym have you joined?

I joined one too and I deliberately found one that was more of a “country club” type. Meaning it’s got nice facilities where people actually stay for lunch or an drink and load of comfy places to sit for a nice coffee etc. Also means there are other events organised etc and just generally people live in them a bit.

I’ve definitely found it easier to actually meet people and turn it into more than a smile across a gym class, compared to the modern type of gyms where (in my experience)everyone is quite focused and in their own world.

I can’t really afford a gym like that at the minute. I’m in London so it’s literally the bog standard sports centre gym. I’m adjusting to my own finances and having to pay bills 100% myself. Maybe once I’m on my feet I can get a bit more picky. Just a bit lost at the minute I think

What do you/ did you enjoy doing?

How about joining an art class or a walking group? I joined a mindfulness meditation group and made a couple of new friends. Also, night-school courses are good for meeting people. I know how you feel.
some if your current friends should make time for the odd trip out with you, knowing your situation.

If you have the time and you like dogs how about joining Borrow My Dog, you get the advantage of meeting the dog owners that you borrow from and the owners that are out walking their own dogs.

I know it's not for everyone but it may be good for you.

Do you run? I’ve found good friends in the past through running groups or clubs. Many clubs in London have beginner programs if you’re not already a runner. Usually cheap to join and low to no fees to join in on club runs and more of a range of paces than you might imagine.

Team sports clubs like netball, basketball, roller derby, or crafty things if you aren't sporty?

Crochet, knitting, book clubs, what did you enjoy doing?

It’s bloody hard. Meet up apps? Not the dating ones but the friendship ones? People will say volunteering but it’s actually easier said than done to find something that fits. As my teens got older I actually started to do some evening work-in a bar, which was very sociable and even when it wasn’t at least I was earning a bit. Zero hours contracts are your friend for once in this situation as you don’t need to over commit

hey - I feel exactly the same! My son is nearly 9 and he’s with me 95% of the time so evening classes isn’t really an option for me… all my friends are married off now and just at different stages of their lives! Where do you live? I’m in Cheshire 😊

Where I live someone was in a similar position to yourself. She put a message out on Facebook .... very sociable, new to the area, anyone else? like to meet up with a view to walks, talks, drinks theatre etc.

There were quickly 500 now over 1000 members. Not a high proportion attend things, but I know lots just made the one or two friends they wanted and got on with their lives!

I think there is a Meet-up app . That might be helpful.

Thanks

Hi . I made made some
Lovely friends in bumble BFF - it’s like a dating app for female friendships

Book club? Ours is quite casual and we organise local nights out as well.

I've posted about this before under different usernames when this topic comes up. I started my own meetup group. It was a bit daunting, and quite a learning curve, but it changed my life.

I'd tried a couple of local meetup groups, but they weren't a good fit for me. I wasn't looking for a man, and mixed groups can definitely have a bit of an 'introduction group' vibe, with unwanted attention and DMs from creepy men. I was also in my 50s, so the 'wild and wacky' women's groups, with much younger members, didn't work for me either. So I started my own, for women 50+.

It got off to a bumpy start, but has evolved into a lovely, supportive group. It stopped being a meetup group years ago, and moved to a whatsapp group. It's now whittled down to a dozen or so of us, which is more than enough, and there's usually something going on every week for those interested. 6 of us have recently returned from a holiday in Cornwall, and we have lots planned before Christmas.

As a previous poster said, if you started a fb group you'd get lots of responses, but think carefully about who it is you want to attract, and word your group description accordingly. You can add qualifying questions. Mine were basic: are you a woman aged 50+? Do you live in or around (name of town)?

Give it a go!