What the hell to do

[WildOnce]

Here I am again, the habitual career crisis. A breakdown of my career thus far (and actually a breakdown in the other sense).

• English and History degree, 1st. I love studying and both subjects.
• A year as a TA, teaching not for me.
• Office jobs which lead to 6 years in HR and a CIPD. Don’t enjoy HR,

I’m 35 and I have had 2 children in the last 4 years, one is now at school and the other is about to start preschool. I’ve been a SAHM for 8 months but need a job and would like to retrain.

I am so indecisive. I have considered: nursing, occupational therapy, SALT, geography degree, psychotherapy, tech/coding type stuff, social work, medicine, housing.

I used to be academically strong but kids have, er, somewhat drained my brain
power and when it comes down to it I have no confidence.

I don’t know what to do but I have to do
something after literally years of dither. I’ve considered applying to a care home to get some real health and social care experience. My interests are politics, history, reading, feminism and I find public’s health v interesting.

I’m lost.

Why not try a couple of free courses to really narrow down where your interest really lies (OU do free short courses in many different subjects). Could you refocus on the subjects you did at degree and find jobs relating directly to those?

That's quite a scattergun list. Do you know what you want to achieve here?

What did you dislike about HR and teaching?

Why did you pick the items on your shortlist/ ideas list?

What do you want your career/working life to look like in 10 years? What would your job need to involve day to day for it to feel manageable and satisfying?

Are you after money? Status? Stability? Stretching?

I’ve considered applying to a care home to get some real health and social care experience.

Nothing to lose really if you're currently not working so presumably your finances can cope if it doesn't work out? And if it does work out it could be useful for future applications.

@MissGroves Yes I could do some
free courses now I have more time. I also volunteered for the Samaritans between children and really enjoyed it and got good feedback. Should try and pick that up again.

If you are interested in academia you could look at something like critical public health which would feed your interests in public health, politics and feminism 👍🏻

@aspirationalflamingo

I suppose the theme of the list veers towards helping people, a job with learning opportunities and public sector.

HR - all about helping the business and not the people really. Really can’t pretend to be excited about a new recruitment software it just means nothing to me. Office work probably doesn’t suit
me though I enjoyed certain aspects like
input on policies; the people facing stuff and evaluating data and jobs/salaries.

Teaching - I love the idea and the chance to explore my subjects but so much of it was crowd control and the pressure on teachers was immense. Not sure I have the passion to overcome the latter.

Why have I chosen what I have. They are all interesting to me, are a public service and many have clear pathways to a career. My uni subjects didn’t have that and if I’m going to retrain I need to know that I’ve got a job at the end of it.

In ten years, not sure. Established in a role and looking for the next progression maybe.

I’m not after money but I don’t want to work for minimum wage for years on end. I’d like to become respected in what I do and maybe do further study which is why health and social care also appeals: lots of learning opportunities which I enjoy.

I wanted to be an academic really but long story short; it didn’t happen.

@Kimchi thank you I will look at that

Do you have friends or people you know whose careers you admire, whose jobs sound interesting? Ask if you can have a coffee with them. Try to build a support network. Can you reconnect with people from your past, through LinkedIn? Personal connections are hugely helpful, I’ve found, when trying to learn about a sector or explore opportunities. Pick a short free course, as suggested, for a taster. I’m a great believer in ‘just do it’ signing up to courses; somehow you will find the time, a skill is never wasted, and you can connect with new people.

I wondered if it was about helping people when I saw your second post. That makes sense why you disliked HR.

I think some of the reasons against teaching are factors that also make it difficult to work for the NHS, eg as a nurse. There's what you hoped to do in a role Vs what is actually possible with budgets and culture.

As I understand it, psychotherapy can be difficult to find work once qualified unless you want to go into private practice.

Out of your list, occupational therapy or possibly social work might give you the most flexibility to work in a variety of settings to find a good fit for you - OTs are part of lots of services. OTs and social workers both work in mental health teams, so your experience with Samaritans might be useful.

If what you really want to do is be an academic then do that.

If it takes a bit longer, it doesn't matter.

As a much much more mature student than you, I can assure you that there is tons of help around, and an international community of helpful academics (Tara Brabazon ❤️) and helpful other students.

Maybe start by picking a masters that interests you and go from there.

Rather than trying to find your "forever career", maybe as someone who is very motivated by learning you will have more of a "portfolio career"?

In which case it could be about making choices that keep doors open and can be used as future stepping stones through building skills, experience and connections.

Just a word of advice regarding social work, you will spend a lot of time, if not actually in the office, doing office things like daily recordings, safeguarding forms, court reports etc, you might also spend a lot of time driving between appointments depending on your local area and the branch of social work you choose.

As you go up the career ladder you will have less and less contact with clients. You can consider social work education or even do research, but you really need a good few years of practice under your belt first.

Don't get me wrong, it can be a great job and occasionally you really do make a difference to peoples lives, but its also incredibly stressful and high pressure.

What a lovely bunch, thanks so much to everyone for posting.

@aspirationalflamingo you speak a lot of sense, I think I can be a bit 'all or nothing' a portfolio career is probably well suited to me and might help me build skills and keep me interested. Occupational Therapy does keep coming up on other threads and in my research as a career which is somewhat shielded from the worst of the NHS crisis and offers a lot of variety.

@SleepPrettyDarling I need to do more of this. I spoke to my friend who is a nurse and she told me not to do it 😂. I am not so good at putting myself out there but I need to start doing it.

@Nellieinthebarn thanks for the insight, I will bear that in mind.

@Yarnysaurus I wish I had your spirit! I am not sure I would go back to Eng and Hist BUT I do think once I have many years under my belt I would love to move into academia in the subject I retrain in.

@WildOnce I think we are twins!!

Also previous HR background, also volunteered with Samaritans, also a mum looking for a new career and also no idea what that looks like!

I'm currently working as a maternity assistant which I do really enjoy but find it hard to commit to the hours. Wish I could progress further but warned off midwifery similar to what your friend was saying. I'm afraid I don't have any input as I question career life myself but just had to say hi as we are so similar!

After years out of the workforce and needing to start again, (and after a few foot in the door admin roles) I got a job as frontline call centre for a major insurance company. Once there, frontline staff are their source for the majority of their further hires within the organisation and I have had several promotions in a few years.

So something like this? It does require starting at base salary for a couple of years but there are so many internal courses and training programs that anyone keen in furthering themselves had loads of opportunities to do so.

Hello! Glad to know I’m not the only one 😂.

It is really hard when you have kids, I never really understood before but the idea of doing v long hours and shift work scares me but then I want to do more than be a SAHM or a job I don’t enjoy. Gah.

Re midwifery, what has your experience of maternity units been out of interest? Great that you’ve got some experience in something else. So funny re the other similarities.

@pancakes222 tag fail

How did you get on OP? Did you make any decisions?

I'm similar so doing an HNC to ease me back into it before embarking on something heavier.

The colleges have some brilliant courses on offer & my lecturers are amazing and accommodating all things considered.

I haven’t made any decisions but back working in HR to pay the mortgage….the dream lives on! Now thinking psychology conversion course.