Stuck and miserable…need a plan!

[ScottishMouse]

I’m new here and have been reading through these threads with interest. Some lovely supportive comments and help.

I am feeling very stuck in life and need a plan for a change in direction. I’m currently working very part-time in early years education, a job I took when my kids were little as it fitted in around our life. OH travels a lot for work so I needed term time work during school hours. But now my kids are almost all headed for secondary school, and I feel unfulfilled and like I have lost myself.

Prior to kids I was in academia - but only had a few years postdoc experience post PhD before I left. My subject area was linguistics, though my research was very interdisciplinary so I am used to reading and researching in and around subject areas that I have no training in. I also did a short stint working in IT - this is definitely not for me.

I don’t really want to go back to academia, and probably wouldn’t be able to find my way back in after so much time in any case. There are things I liked about it - mostly writing and teaching - but lots I did not.

My problem is that I have no ideas at all where to go next. I would like my work to make a measurable difference to the lives of others, but I don’t have a strong instinct for how this would look. For example, I could more happily do research if I felt it was making a difference (one of my problems with what I was previously researching). But I also like working with people directly, supporting them in different ways (I do this to an extent in my current role with both kids and adults). I love writing, both academically and more expressively. And I have a busy enquiring mind, so learning is very important to me.

What does all this add up to though?? Over the past decade, I have seriously considered going back to uni to study psychology (what I initially wanted to study but for some stupid reason I didn’t), but some honest conversations with myself have forced me to drop this idea. The subsequent career routes are just too off-putting in terms of time, money, and uncertainty.

Thanks for reading all of that! I would love to hear any of your ideas if something here strikes a chord.

Let's fast forward 10-15 years when your children have left home. What do you want life to look like at that point?

And how critical are finances (both now and for retirement) to the decisions you make?

Good things to think about, thanks @aspirationalflamingo . I see myself as having at least another 20-25 years of work in me at this point, and when the kids are gone I would like to be working full-time in a role that fulfils me. I want to throw myself back into working in a way that I haven’t had the chance to do for the last 10-15 years, and would like to work well into my 70s or later if possible.
Finances are an important consideration, more for the longer term than immediately. Right now, I earn very little. Most roles would be an upgrade financially. Extensive retraining would be tricky in terms of course costs and loss of earnings, but not impossible if it would pay off in the longer term.

What does fulfilment mean to you? You've said it a couple of times but I'm not sure what you mean by it.

Continually learning/stretching yourself (you mentioned that's important to you - would it be enough on its own to fulfil you in a role?)?

Feeling like you're making a difference to other people (again you did mention this but would it be enough to know you worked in a role that indirectly helped people or would you want to have a more direct role?)

Having great workplace relationships? Travelling like your OH? Stability? Constant change?

Have you looked at apprenticeships to see if anything inspires you (or turns you off - because that's useful info too)? Either degree apprenticeships or otherwise?

If you're hoping to work into your 70s I'm guessing that your vision isn't of a physical job?

If you can get specific and detailed about your ideal vision of the future, it will be easier to identify practical paths that could make it happen.

Over a span of 20-25 years the answer may be more than one career, especially as someone who values learning.

Sorry I reread your post several times and still managed to miss the line where you said you wanted to have a measurable and direct impact.

How would you feel about social work or occupational therapy?

Retrain as a Speech and Language Therapist?

I'm sure I read somewhere that Occupational Therapist MSc is funded but not something I know about, that could be an option.

@aspirationalflamingo all these questions are so so useful, thank you! I am going to take some time to consider them and see where that takes me.
I have looked at both social work and occupational therapy, as it happens. I have some complicated background childhood/family history which I’d rather not go into here, but my instinct is that certain of the caring/helping professions (if that is not too broad or derogatory a term) might bring up difficult things for me so I need to tread carefully in that space. Yes, I would very much like to make a direct difference, but I maybe need to be thinking out of the box slightly.
I will spend some time with your prompts, so grateful for you taking the time.

@greenmarsupial , yes SLT is something I have considered. But it doesn’t really excite me as much as I feel it should to take the leap into something new.

Has anyone here ever seen a careers coach, and was it worth it? Is there anything in particular one should be looking for when trying to find such help?

@ScottishMouse i came across this post in a search and wow I feel like we could almost be the same person - even down to the PhD specialism! Albeit I carried on working in third sector research and while I enjoy my job I’m very ready for the next thing as I’m bored and not stretched now.
Did you speak to a career coach?