I hate myself, why am I like this.

[Eladaisybeth]

I've struggled with my weight since having my daughter (5), I got into the habit of comfort eating and binging and put on 4 stone. Last year I got it under control by doing the keto diet but since Christmas I've put it all back on my diet is terrible I've been eating sugar constantly. Now I'm panicking I'm pretty sure I'm prediabetic, today I started back on keto did really well all day but this evening I ate one crisp off my daughters plate and it led to a complete binge session I feel so shameful and guilty over it.
I don't know why I'm posting this I'm just lost.

Try not to feel guilt and shame because neother of these will help motivate you to lose weight.

Today it didn't work out. But you learned that crisps are a trigger binge food. So maybe don't keep them in the house and don't serve them to your daughter.

Is keto the right weight loss diet for you? It's great for some people but not for everyone. Some of us thrive better on a Mediterranean diet - with complex carbs like brown rice, red rice, wholemeal bread, potatoes with their skins on, brown lentils etc as part of the diet, along with loads of veg, fruit, lean protein like chicken breast, white fish, tinned tuna in spring water, poached or boiled eggs, quark and skyr yoghurts etc.

Could you focus on super healthy and nutritious foods in moderate portions, and up your strength training and water intake?

I always think you shouldn’t diet when you feel low about yourself. It’s just another stick to beat yourself with. I stopped dieting when I realised I would still hate myself if I was slim. So I worked on taking care of my mh first.

Thanks so much. The reason I like keto is that once I'm in ketosis the food noise all stops and it's just easy I want to eat healthy and don't think about food no willpower required after first couple of days. But its a double edge sword once I'm out of ketosis I'm back to square one.

Ah, so maybe keto is the right thing for you. Nice for the food noise to stop. Just start again tomorrow.

Can you try making your DD's food so that the carbs you give her are things you really don't like or are easy for you to reject?

If I am trying not to overeat I buy snacks for DH and DC that I really dislike but they do like. Makes it easy not to be tempted.

Start gently. Focus on things you genuinely enjoy that are nutritious and helpful choices. Once you've built those into your routine and your weekly shop, build on that, gradually. it's a marathon, not a sprint, and it has to be something that works for you.

Look into glycemic spikes, there's plenty of material online. As a small step, always eat some of your salad or your veg upfront at the start of your meal. It lines your stomach and stops the carbs and the sugars heading straight into storing fat.

Also, if you can, get into intermittent fasting - ie skip breakfast. After a few days you won't normally miss it, ( if you do, then have sone on the occasional day), and it gives the body a chance to burn some fat and tidy up a few rogue cells that might do you damage in the longer term.

It sounds like keto diet is the right thing for your body but it needs to be for life rather than stop and start.

Surprised why would you 5 year old eat crisps? Didn't realise that's a thing in the UK.

I find that if you eliminate any food group the likelihood of binging is very strong.

As when you eat keto you might have quite high fat. So as soon as you add carbs it just feels like a failure so you eat tons of carbs etc.

Would calorie counting be better for you? Then you could have a bit of everything you like as long as it's within your TDEE.

Op, success is of you can stick to it lomg term and make it a way of life. Doesn’t matter if it’s keto, calorie control, slimming world , it’s not about getting the weight off, it’s about keeping it off.

so keto doesn’t work for you. You can’t sustain it and it leads to binges on carbs. And regain.

stop the cycle now, possibly calorie control is better for you.

I would suggest joining the low carb group on here who are incredibly supportive @BIWI

Your dd definitely doesn't need crisps as part of an evening meal OP, that's really unhealthy. I'd look at improving your dd's diet and both eating the same meals. Most veg is carbs so don't cut out carbs, just cut out all the white over processed ones - you can't stay on keto forever it's not healthy. Have a meal plan so you're all eating healthy, don't buy crisps and biscuits it's just crap and tempting as hell.

Make sure you're eating 3 healthy meals a day and if you're craving something sweet in between have an apple or some dates. Plenty of sugar but also fibre and no crap.

I'd also look at your happiness levels - you say you've been comfort eating, why? Is there anything you can do to improve your life to make you happier and reduce the desire for comfort eating.

Hating yourself is absolutely the worst way to feel about this. If you hate yourself then there's no reason to look after yourself and you might as well just eat all the crap. You need to start liking yourself, accepting yourself and looking after yourself.

The problem is that calorie counting doesn't work for everyone. Human body is complex and for some deficit calories make the fat stick even stronger and not leave. For me this definitely is not suitable. Most people on calorie reducing diets are constantly thinking about food and feeling hungry, neither which happens on keto diet. Which BTW is safe for life.

Yeah that's true. Sorry, I wasn't saying keto is bad. Just that I know what I get like when I try and go very low carb. It's true you can end up eating a very small amount of calories if your body tries to cling onto them you still don't lose!

Nothing works for everyone, there is no one answer.

the issue here is keto doesn’t work for the op. Because it’s not about just getting the weight off, it’s about keeping it off, and this is very fast regain, the op is saying she’s regained 4 stone since Xmas. That’s concerningly fast weight gain.

and she’s still bingeing.

so the last thing she should do is try keto again, as she’s going to have the same issue again as she can’t maintain it for life.

so I don’t know what will work for her, but I’d suggest calorie counting , low carb, not keto, high protein, healthy veg, and salad, dairy and low sugar.

get herself to eating healthy then decrease.

it seems like you may benefit from being a bit kinder to yourself, taking things one step at a time. It’s really hard when you have young kids and I get exactly how much a crisp can set off the urge to eat everything.
what has worked for me is intermittent fasting and not having the wrong type of food in the house, and mixing up low carb/keto during the the week and what I fancy at the weekend. Sometimes this all fails due to outside stress (my extended family), I just let it go as I can start again the next day.

I think when you have a child in the house it’s harder (especially once they are able to buy their own food!), but it sounds like you are still in control of the food shop, so don’t buy stuff like this for home, save it for treats in the park or wherever.

the most important thing is to not beat yourself up about it. I was 2 stone overweight for most of my sons teen years as I was dealing with so much stress. It was what it was.