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Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

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Can a bloke stay over, in the same bed and be ok with nothing happening ? Really ??

9 replies

MrsMorgan · 03/07/2010 23:40

Kind of seeing a bloke I know from when we were at school.

For various reasons, he is probably stopping over at mine on Friday. Now I would gladly sleep with him, but I am having problems with side effects of my pill and so probably won't be able to actually have sex.

I've not told him this, but he originally said that sleeping with me and nothing else was all he wanted anyway.

I am very sceptical about this. I think he will definitely try it on, and I am unsure of what to do.

Help

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belledechocolatefluffybunny · 03/07/2010 23:43

Trust. If you don't trust him then the sofa it is. Not all men are sex fiends waiting to get their leg over, it's your call though.

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MrsMorgan · 03/07/2010 23:46

Ok, thanks.

I think, that if I say no, then he will be fine tbh. It is just me being paranoid i think. I would prefer to have the option of deciding what went on, but oh well, bloody pill.

I am excited and scared in equal amounts lol.

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belledechocolatefluffybunny · 03/07/2010 23:48

Just tell him you want to take it slowly, there's no need to rush into things. If he's a gent then he'll behave.

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mamas12 · 04/07/2010 00:45

To answer your post I would say NO
Unfortunately in my experience in situations like this (and yes I have had this happen to me a few times - always thinking that of course the man inquestion means it) They don't I'm afraid.

Sofa it is and if he persists he has another agenda.

You did ask

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Dominique07 · 04/07/2010 00:47

Maybe he just wants to snuggle up. Not all men will have to have sex and then you'd send him to the sofa. He'd be mad to want to risk it if you've said there are problems with your contraception.

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Niceguy2 · 04/07/2010 02:13

He'll definitely want sex.

How far he pushes it and how he takes potential rejection will be the mark of the man.

When I first got together with my GF, she stayed over in my bed and we didn't have sex. I knew if I pushed her it would have spelled disaster.

So it can happen. BUT he will definitely want it.

The obvious answer is to just use a condom.

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MrsMorgan · 04/07/2010 21:30

Thank you for the replies.

I agree that he will want to. I will also want to probably, but I think i'd rather wait a bit longer, and see if he can be true to his word.

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mamas12 · 04/07/2010 22:14

Good luck but keep the condoms in reach.

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FeelingOld · 04/07/2010 23:31

Well in my experience yes it can happen.
When I met my DP 2 years ago he stayed over at mine after about 6 dates (we live 28 miles apart and took it in turns not drinking and driving over to each others to start with) and he fully intended sleeping in my daughters room (kids at their dads) but we had such a lovely time we both decided to share a bed as we thought it would be nice to snuggle up and have a cuddle. We both kept our underwear on and he was a true gent.
He did admit that he just wanted to ravage me (as i did him!!) but he said he would not have crossed the boundaries we set.