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Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Lone parents

Benefit help through a breakup?

10 replies

pixiepop · 24/06/2010 17:30

I have just split up with my partner. I have two children one aged 7 and other is aged 8 months. we still live in a privatly rented property thats lease isnt over until december. We just split up this weekend even though our relationship has been over for about 4 months. We were living on my xpartners wages and i recieve dla, child benefit and child tax credits for the children. I cant afford to move out right at the moment as i have no spare money and struggling on the childrens benefits, and i cant afford to live here alone as the rent is far too high and other bills. So where i do i go from here?

As we are living separate lives and not together even though hes under the same roof do i have any rights to claim anything like income support? I was told i will be classed as a lone parent now but surely not as hes under this roof even though were not together. Hes in the spare bedroom and i hardly see him if im honest which is a blessing atm. He started buying separate food at the weekend and has his own food cupboard and stopped using the joint bank account and told me today hes moved his wages to his own account. He said he will pay his half of the bills and i need to pay my half until i can find somewhere to live..but how...my money wont stratch even to half of that atm..

any advice would be appreciated thankyou.

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Chandra · 24/06/2010 17:34

You may get a supplement as a lone parent family, however as both children are living still under the same roof as their father I don't know if they would be able to say you are the resident parent and therefore the one t o receive such benefits while he is still living there and contributing to the rent. Who buys your children's food?

Talk to the job centre, they can help you out to find out what benefits do you qualify for. It would be also good for you to put your name down in the list of HA as soon as possible, having said that it would be a long wait for that.

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pixiepop · 24/06/2010 17:46

Thankyou for your reply Chandra. I buy everything for the children, I always have. Im unsure how the low income benefits work as i havent claim anything apart from whats listed above before, if i cant get as a lone parent cause my x is still in the same house, do i still ring income support and try and get it for myself, very confused atm sorry.

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toccatanfudge · 24/06/2010 17:47

You can apply for IS while living under the same roof. You'll then have a compliance officer come out to see you and your exDP to ascertain that you are actually separated but living together - ie that you're a lone parent.

So they'd want to see living arrangements, food arrangements/bills etc etc.

Obvoiusly it's not as straightforward as claiming on your own, but it can be done.

Why won't he move out?

You'd get the housing benefit to help cover the rent so could stay there even without him contributing.

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pixiepop · 24/06/2010 17:55

He says he wants to stay here as it's close to his work and to be honest I'm sure he has someone else that's why I have decided to leave. My landlord also stated when we moved in not accepting anyone on housing benefits so it makes it awkward for me. My partner is only the father officially to my son even though my daughter classes him as daddy .

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GypsyMoth · 24/06/2010 17:59

have you thought where you'll go?

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pixiepop · 24/06/2010 18:03

No idea at the moment to be honest. I thought if i could get on my feet money wise i could save a deposit to get the kids into a private rented house that accepts people on benefits or go on the housing list which ive been told can take over a year. I hope to get it done sooner rather than later as its sending me crazy being here and i know the kids are getting effected. All we do is argue and he leaves me in tears whenever he is here.
Im sorry to burden people here but its the only place i can talk about all of this, so i want to thankyou all.

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GypsyMoth · 24/06/2010 18:10

i think he should go....asap....its not helping the situation,and you'll have to claim hb. the landlord wont be able to do much about it,these things happen

call about housing....depending on where you are,you may get lucky!

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Niceguy2 · 24/06/2010 18:21

You need to move out asap. Staying in the same house is not an option.

You will struggle to get benefits, you are going to struggle emotionally. Such an atmosphere won't help the kids.

I'd speak to the benefits office and see what options you have about renting privately and see if they can help with a deposit. Or perhaps a family member can?

No point in staying in a house where you cannot afford and your ex is there. It's just going to make you even more miserable.

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pixiepop · 24/06/2010 20:17

I have no one that can help with a deposit. I think thanks to the people here ive decided to put me and my children down on the council and housing list and then see how long it could take. I will then put my claim in once we are moved and try and cope in meantime with my bills etc.

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toccatanfudge · 24/06/2010 23:39

ring your local housing options team (have a look on the council website - it'll be under housing somehwere, might have a slightly different name - it's not the housing benefit people, they may be called "homeless" something or other).

You may be eligible for help under the rent assistance scheme to move into the private rental market.