ex wearing me out... broken record non emotive, simple facts technique tried - he just keeps coming back with more and more attempts to argue his view...
latest is he thinks i should move into flat we still joint own (is rented out) which is next door to him, so i "save money". i am renting, not far away, a much nicer flat with garden...is MY place i can close door - when i allowed him in when i first moved - to see dcs - he smashed up the flat and assaulted me... why would i move next door to someone who verbally abuses me still when he gets chance at handovers and has phsyically assaulted me? i fled with the dcs due to his verbal and physical abuse, mostly verbal/emotional... but he had assaulted me and ds when in throes of mental breakdown...
dds see him weds eve and alternate weekends, not yet staying o/nite,except one nite they did on his insistence; there is court order (his violence, MH issues etc) but contact is gradually increasing...ds (autistic learning disabled) - issues with him running off not being secure with ex, SS and police have said "stick to supervised for him").
his attempts to manipulate/argue -
"Moving to flat next door it is totally possible and is the best solution right the tenants are living by the end of august and before the girls school begins you could move all your stuff. We could ask xxx to borrow the big transit van for a weekend and I got people that will help me. Then you live your life there as you want. But share the children lives as you should
"For our children, their well being and future and their rights you might want to consider what true love is and compromise.
"Moving them to the flat next door to me will make a very positive impact and change for their future lives, in all aspects! Above all If you want to finally recognise their rights to a father and rights to their every day lives being shared with heir father -as well as with their mother- you will try to see how much more important in their lives that is over the garden. There is plenty of parks and gardens around this area
"Staying where you are is nothing to be with our children well being needs and secuirty -it is you ego and selfishness only you-
"If you want to have your own single family, your own way, your own like all the time, please go and adopt some children and start a new single mum family then have the total control, saying liking and responsibility
"When the children is concern please always remember that "they are our children (you and me/ me and you)" They have rights to two parents two homes two families, two cultures, two languages and two holidays too.
"A petition in their name would you pleas stop this and recognise them above yourself and give them back their rights to a family and two parents
"I only want my children lives back, that you took away from me
My children need me every day as part of their lives -as much as they need you too
I only want their rights recognised,
Can't you see it
"I am not interested in selling the flats right now as it will be a loss and above all I the children need a home for them selves and their father . "
heck no i cant see it... i am proviing a home for the children, providing eveything for them (he makes no financial contribution, has been a struggle to get him to buy food for them when they with him...) faciltiating contact, gradually building it up since he emerged from being on the floor depressed unable to turn up for contact from sept 2009 up to end december 2009 .
dont i have right to a peaceful life away from him?
letting dcs go see him, faciltiating their contact, etc. but I dont have to live next door to him!