depressed!!

[frazzle26]

Yesterday, I tried to change a light bulb but couldn't even when I stood on a step ladder as I'm only 5 foot!! It just made me feel a little bit sad and lonely as it made me think about how nice it would be to have someone to ask to do little jobs like that (unless I was married to someone even smaller than me of course!!)

Has anyone else ever had a moment like that as a single parent that has made them feel particularly sad?? xx

being lone parent is really hard when you have noone to help you.
i know how you are feeling.
we have to learn-know everything and we have to be able to do everything on our own.
other than that you cant share any emotions, etiher.
but one thing is worser than that i guess; being in a bad relationship.
i think we have to take one step at a time, i am sure you will be able to do it next time.
good luck.

I had some moments today... Tumble Tots has moved to a new venue which is part of a big sports complex with softplay area. After TT's DD (2.5) wanted to play so we stayed on. Cue lots of daddies looking after their tinies while the mummies have a cup of coffee and read the paper. Just made me a bit sad and normally this kind of thing doesn't bother me at all. The other thing is when it snows - I don't want to clear the bloody path!!

and i am trying to make my ds do his homework.
if there were 2 people one would help the child, keep him busy, teach him, the other would do other home stuff.
now we have to do all.
with which energy i dont know.
i guess our children must be able to do most stuff themselves and help us from time to time.
but its very hard to get them there.

for the reason of feeling sad and inadequate...i never go to places like mothercare, mamas and papas, or anywhere else that there are many couples excitedly buying things for their babies. i learned this quickly after i nearly burst into tears at the counter when the woman at the counter asked me where my parner was to carry all the bags for me ( was about 8 months preg at the time) this time i have just avoided it...remind me how do you end up in the same situation twice!

I get a bit fed up with friends who worry about coping when their dp/dh etc goes away on a business trip. They seem to forget that I do it every single day alone with no respite.

I agree about sharing the evening routine. It would be lovely to have someone else who could help with the homework or do bath time, cook dinner etc. Instead I spend most evenings wondering where the time has gone.

I sympathise Frazzle.

Everytime I look at the lawn-mower I wish I could magic up a nice strong man to do it for me...then maybe nice strong man could come in and have a cuppa...then nice strong man might offer to help me put up a picture (or something) in the bedroom...and then

And then I remember that I had a husband and he was a drunken, controlling, manipulative and domineering bully.

I mow the lawn while cursing the whole way through (I'm only little too!), then make myself a cuppa...

and feel pretty darned proud of myself.

I know it can be hard, but just think of all we achieve on our own.

I have days when I feel lonely but check out some of the threads on this site - so funny and make you laugh out loud.

Good luck and stay strong x

itshappened - your post made me well up a bit. It reminded me of an NHS ante-natal class I attended when about 8 months pregnant. Huge room with approx 50 couples and me sitting in a circle. First question from experienced midwife, introduce yourself and then the man has to say when baby is due and if sex is known. Great. I was nearly last and had pleasure of saying "I'm on my own". Next exercise, all stand up. We all stand up. Then we have to turn to our "partner" and he will tell us how he will support us during labour. I stand there like a lemon. We all sit down. I get up, and walk out. Trainee midwife rushes after me and so do couple I know from NCT classes. Am persuaded to go back in but still I wish I hadn't and had taken bloody woman's name and complained. BITCH! Phew - that felt better. It's only been 2.5 years, you'd think I might be over it by now...

Anywaaaay, most of the time I'm happy and proud to be a single parent. I love the relationship I have with DD and I know she's very spoiled because I'm trying to make up for not having daddy around but I think we'll be ok.

Hope you all have a surprisingly wonderful day today.

I think it is very up and down. This week has been hard but then today ds goes to rugby and scores three tries. I was so proud, particularly that he actually ran in the right direction (another first!) . Although even then I thought how nice it would be if ds had his dad there watching (as most of others did have).

I know how you feel. I am on my own this week as my boys have gone skiing with their dad. I did all the packing, made sure their gear fitted, bought new stuff where they needed it and dropped them and everything else off with him. I feel a bit sad as it is a trip we made loads of times as a family. Now we take it in turns to go alone with our children. It is a tough week. I also went to look round a new school with the kids last week, ex didnt turn up and I had to explain to the headmaster that I wasnt Mrs X but Ms EM!! why do they always assume, you must be married

When I have moments like that I always listen to Christina Aquilera's "Fighter".
And you know what? It works!. If not my single mumming I would have never discovered how strong ans though I am.
So heads up! Could be worse. We could be single with no children

mollie - that's the main time when it gets to me ie when ds2 plays in football team - don't think exh has been to any of his games and hardly attended any of ds1s either because he is too busy with his new family!!

In ds1s team there were several other mums only but in ds2s its usually both parents attending and the manager in particular appears to have a a particularly rosy family life with grandma and grandad turning up as well.

oh and also the faux pity of my mother (who has been married and reliant on a man for over 50 years).

When she says in a sort of sympathetic yet disapproving tone - well it's so hard being on your own isn't it - as if she'd bloody know.

They never compliment me on how I'm doing only criticise.

thats how some of the families are sincitylover.
in fact they are one of the reasons for our situation.

The whole Valentine's Day hoo-hah is making me feel a bit left out this week. I know it's probably sour grapes and, after so long you'd think I'd have got used to it, but the in-your-face schmaltz can be incredible depressing when you're outside that particular party. A Facebook friend just asked everyone to 'post a picture of your significant other!!!'.... completely ignoring those of us who don't have one.

Still.... there are plenty of upsides. Just have to keep reminding myself how awful it used to be! LOL