order on divorce that exH pays all costs

[Unlikelyamazonian]

When the divorce was made absolute the judge ordered exh pays all costs. Of course he won't and hasn't because he is absent, abroad, and was/is not in contact at all apart from to acknowledge the petition when it was first served on him by email.

I have paid the costs.

My question is, will there be any record anywhere of the fact that he hasn't paid? How can there be a county court judgement against him or something if he hasn't been in touch to 'refuse' to pay for example?has he just got away with ignoring what the court 'ordered' without any consequences for his credit record (not that he will give a stuff about that as he is in asia)

Can anyone help with an answer?

UA can't give you a def answer so hoping that someone else will
why have you had to pay the costs?

I don't understand why you have paid the costs he was supposed to have paid?
Don't the coursts chase the person that has the costs against them?

Hope someone comes to you aid soon UA

Hi thanks for replies. ExH went abroad when he left. beyond any jurisdiction. So nobody can pursue him for anything - maintenance, court orders, nothing. And he pays nothing. And we are not in contact. In fact I really don't know where he is now.

I spoke to my sol this morning (trying to avoid it as he is 200 quid a bloody hour!!!) and he says there will only be a judgement made against Exh to pay the divorce costs if I pursue him through the courts for the money. (it has all cost me about 7 grand. Ugh)

But that what is the point of doing that when it just means he can dodge it all anyway as I no longer know where he lives in Asia and he would just not bother answering an email or call - even if the email address and mobile number were still correct. Which I don't know.

So yes. I have my answer. There will be no credit repercussions for him. He can walk away from the court order too with impunity unless I pursue him.

And there is no point in pursuing him as it would give me angina and I don't want anything to do with him.

ironically (and this makes me far far more angry) I am enquiring about getting my son's birth certificate actually re-issued on grounds that my husband left when the baby was 6 months old, that neither he nor his family have any contact with my son and I am now known by my maiden name - and that my son calls himself by my maiden name now. Plus exh has been in the papers locally for what he has done and I do not see any reason why my son should have to carry that stigma locally by sharing his (unusual) surname.

grr rambling but I feel about this very very strongly and I will not be the only mother who is in this horrid position with their children by absent fathers.

I have been told I can only change ds's name by deed poll and can never get the birth cert changed - and yet I understand that apparently, in adoption cases, they can reissue a birth certificate.

Even talking about this makes me so angry! Why should my son carry this man's surname for the rest of his life when he abandoned him at 6 months, has nothing to do with him and I now have to endure my son having a different surname (on paper - paper that he would have to reproduce forever alongside any deed-poll change of name deed) fom myself??

This is taken from the website 'adoptioninformation.com'

"An original birth certificate is issued at the birth of a child and is issued before an adoption takes place. An amended birth certificate is the new birth certificate that is issued for an adopted child after an adoption becomes final. It shows the adoptive parents' names like they are the biological parents. This is the birth certificate that becomes placed in public records."

In my circumstances I think my ds should have his original birth certificate amended as above. But the family law department of my large local solicitors had never even heard of such a thing.

You are very very angry it's plain to see and in the most part that is very healthy.

You have not answered why you have paid the costs though when you don't need to.

The birth certificate is another thing altogether. May I suggest you find someone who does know something about this subject and then decide.
I feel being proactive in realising your new life will be enormously helpful.
It sounds as if you have come an awfully long way already and you need to just take a 'breath' before the next step.

Hi mammas. I paid the costs because they have to be paid and it is then up to me to pursue him. The solicitor does not pursue him/courts etc. I have to do that and to be honest I don't want the trauma of tying to pursue him. i just wish it could be recorded somewhere official that he ignored the court's order. But that would only happen, as I say, if I pursued him and he refused. Seems unfair but then nothing in this has been fair. Never mind.

It seems if I wish to amend my son's birth certificate I would have to search fo 'precedents' for such a thing. If there are none then I could try setting a precedent by going through the courts but god that could cost me a fortune.

Thanks for replying. I am not as angry as i was a year ago thank god!

Glad to hear it. But a good dose of anger can be healthy you know, to get you places.

Sounds like you have a few long term goals there and I wish you luck.
Do you have any short term, how do I say this without sounding patronising, attainable goals that could cheer you up along the way.

If you ever meet and marry someone else then they could adopt your son and change his name that way. Perhaps a marriage of convenience simply to change your son's name to yours?

ha ha cargirl I was talking about just that with a friend yesterday. I would need to find a man who shared my surname though as I would never take a man's name again and if it were a marriage of convenience he would have to take my name too as we would divorce almost immediately and I would still be faced with the same problem only different

We decided it would have been better if I married a red indian with a name like Running Fox - but I can't remember why we decided that now as we were both a bit tipsy.

I might put advert in the Times or Private Eye asking if there are any blokes called amazonian out there who would marry me then immediately divorce.

Short term goals mammas? Yes. To get an indian takeaway tonight and buy a slow cooker.

Long-term goal, to stay alive for ds until he is at least 18 and write a best-seller.

Indian is achieveable I think..