Advice needed urgently!!! long post sorry

[kdk]

Hoping some of you wise and experienced internet daters can tell me what to do ...

A while back (last time I tried online dating) I got chatting to a bloke - we exchanged quite a few messages before I realised it was always me asking the questions and initiating conversations so I stopped - and sadly so did he ....

Anyway, although we have not contacted each other for quite a few months he still views my profile occasionally - the last time the other day. What I want to know is should I contact him - eg spirtit of christmas/goodwill etc. TBH he's about the only bloke I've got chatting to on any of these sites that seems reasonably attractive and intelligent and I would hate to regret not having contacted him in years to come ...

Should I maintain my pride and let him contact me or not - or nail my courage to the mast or whatever the expression is and stand up for a woman's right to initiate things? If anyone wants to look at my profile and give me any (useful) pointers I"d be grateful as well.

And I've got a bloody horrible cold as well .....

kdk i am sorry but i couldnt help laugh at that message!

Lou, what do you mean laugh - I was just about to reply asking for a spin on his scooter - you'll all be jealous when I invite you to the wedding and we putter off slowly into the sunset me riding pillion on his two-stroke ....

omg will he let you touch his shiny helmet?

only if I'm a very good girl and offer to hold his screwdriver and dibber when he gets on with the gardening and diy - and help him count his scars ...

maybe he would let you give it a bit of spit and polish?

God - that's enough - if you don't behave I'll show you a picture - I'm telling you it nearly put me off my turkey leftovers ...

oh blimey, i dunno if i can stand that, i've not long eaten

You don't know what you're missing ... to add insult to injury the one that got away - let's call him ... dunno, Birdman - is now coming up on my list of matches I might be interested in - at least Mr Scooterman hasn't appeared there yet ...

i have had a few guys from dating sites message me asking to be my sex slave, one asking me to be theirs, another asking if he can serve me and and a group of my female friends naked

theres a few loons out there for sure

have had that too - domestic slave maybe but don't know how my kids would take to finding a naked man with a dog collar licking the toilet clean ....

as long as the house is clean its all good

oh god kdk, that is tricky!! tell him that you love hiking and swimming and mini marathons and see if he takes the hint.

in my brief trial of internet dating i had a note from a virgin too but telling me that he had so much to offer,, it went on a bit. about his depression too. i politely told him that we weren't compatible, and then he wrote back to tell me off!!!! i then wrote back a bit more assertively to explain to him that whilst i might be prepared to 'take a risk' or bend over backwards for a friend or somebody I knew, I didn't know him, and obviously owed him nothing!! he wrote back to tell me I was a bitch.

then, another guy rang me even though i was only 3 years younger than him, not his minimum mandatory requirement of five!!! we ended up getting into a row about that! he kept insisting that he thought that women should be five years (minimum)younger than their boyfriends!!! I said, 'i'll let you go then". what a weirdo.

arghghgh.

Have just taken the easy way out and ignored him - hopefully he'll take the hint and scoot off ... have to say, jealous though I am at the apparent amount of LPs who seem to have found partners online - I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who attracts the weirdos/would-be slaves/virgins/toyboys/general f*ckwits - what I want to know, though, is how and where to attract someone I'd like to have a coffee with let alone have sex with!

Hi all - I am beginning to think my profile contains a coded message for I wish to meet seriously weird scary f*ckers - have now had a message some of which I include below

"There are a few women on x who have 'something', despite there being women who are theoretically better matches and/or more conventionally attractive women around. And you are one. You have a hawk-like gaze that puts the fear of, something (I'm an Atheist), into me but, $deity, for some reason I'm attracted to you. Perhaps its that there is definitely a lot going on behind that tight-lipped smile.

Do you want to exchange further messages or are you not interested - or even creeped out?

To help you decide, here are is a little bit more information than is in my profile:
I have a serious job that I am dedicated to and am bracing myself for the first casualty that is close to me - amongst other things I'm in contact with someone else from OKC who is due to go out to theatre in the next year.

I'm a bit of a 'Blossoming Flower' - very different to how I was four years ago and changing almost daily. This has meant that a number of my match questions have changed since I joined OKC. No doubt they will continue to change.

I agree with you over friendship being the first move. My one-and-only ex began as a friend and is still my 'best friend'. Also I have an arrangement for 'casual sex' that will start as soon as our diaries can accommodate it that began with friendship and will continue with that once the carnal side ends - which would be whenever you wished, 'in the unlikely event' etc. (Hopefully that hasn't sent you running for the hills, but I don't believe in concealing such things)."

sorry for length of this message but I seriously think I have more chance of meeting a sane man if he fell on me from high .... off to join a convent/buy a rabbit/drink huge amount of wine/eat several bars of chocolate.

OMG, what site are you on! I never get anything like that on Match.

Creeped out? Completely.

Ta Queen, glad to know it's just me then

I seem to attract these weird people too, plus allot of much younger men.

I like Match, Dating Direct found POF is full of plonkers.

Would be nice to meet someone normal, if there are any normal ordinary blokes out there.

Looking for a cheaper site, someone recommended Smooch & Chat up time might have a look at Hello Cupid too.

I tried Smooch and found it full of players/married guys looking for playing away ... suppose it depends what rocks your boat.

I'm on soulmates but think it's the big 40 thing or something - either that or my profile is crap!

Totally agree with you re Pof - got sent a 'gift' by someone who claimed to be 50 but looked like he could give my mum a year or two.

Where are you IJ? I feel that in London and the south east are swamped with available women and therefore men tend to be very choosy/have unrealistic expectations - or maybe I"m just jealous ...