Ex buying ten tons for Xmas!!

[norksinmywaistband]

H and I have recently split on a permanent basis.

He knows I am on very limited funds and as such have bought the DC a few bits off e-bay.
I have just had another phonecall to say he thought he would just check I am not getting them each a handheld console thingy as he thought he would get them one each as a little extra.

WTF he knows I have no money, these things are £50+
I know he has already bought several presents for them, including the ones they have asked father christmas for( which they will not get til boxing day from him)meaning I have to make up some story about maybe they will get them from someone else as FC must know and therefore bought them something else( and this is something I could have afforded just )

Is this just because he feels bad about breaking up the family due to his affair
Or is he purposely trying do make me feel shit

can he not see you before xmas and give you some of the presents, so you have BOTH contributed to what "father christmas" has bought the kids?
That way, there will be more from FC, and less from him.

NIMWB He's trying to absolve himself from guilt. Typical.

See if you can convince him to nominate some of it as Santa presents that they can open on xmas day. Is he reasonable at all?

(Sounds like a silly question).

Wish I could suggest that, but then he would insist on being here on Xmas morning as he bought them. That is not happening.
He is seeing them for an hour to see them hang their stockings on xmas eve and picking them up on Xmas day at 5pm, but has said he won't give them presents til boxing day which will be his xmas day with them .

norks, you can do nothing about it, he might be doing it to wind you up, he might be doing it to give something to the kids - but whatever the reason you can't stop him doing it.

accept that, and think of it as the kids getting lovely things. they won't appreciate yours any the less.

don't let him wind you up.

Norks in that case I ditto Squirrel.

Honestly, it's only a measure of their guilt.

the nob

Or he just wants to get the kids something they really want for Xmas. My ex gets crappy cheap rubbish for DD, whilst insisting that she buys him and wife presents. Just be happy for your kids - it's not a competition if you don't let it become one.

norks
i've had this from my exh too and as all the others have said it's just a measure of his guilt
extremely mean that he's trying to points score tho esp in the situ you're in atm

I'm with red. I dont see why your ex has to limit his budget to yours. If the shoe were on the other foot would you?

To be blunt, sounds like jealousy on your part and fear that your kids will not appreciate the presents you've had to budget hard for. I can understand that but those are your issues and not your ex's nor your children's.

My situation is the exact reverse of this. My dc's have all just had their birthdays. With them all being just before xmas, I buy stuff all year round, and so they generally have 1 big present and about 4/5 little ones.

It was dd2's birthday yesterday and she went to her dads for the afternoon. He apparently asked what i'd got her and moaned that I was making him look bad as he only got her one gift.

I can see what you mean Norks, but honestly, your dc won't care who got what. Dd's fave present yesterday wasn't from me or xp, it was an rspca calander that my friend got for her.

I had this last year and homestly it wasn't as bad as I'd feared. My DC were so excited abouit Santa coming etc that the actual presents were overlooked. And, as XH deliberately went out and bought them the same as I had, all he got on BOxing Day was "another HSM dance mat" "another Indiana Jones thingy" etc etc!! But my presents were from Santa - I didn't give them much, XH's presents of course were all from him. The penny will drop and soon. Just try and enjoy th eday. It does get easier - this is my 2nd Christmas alone!