firs off - you will probably get a different judge next time , unless this judge specifically said "list with ME"...so unless you are pretty certain you will have same judge then relax a little - by next hearing you will have more reports from SS etc and hopefully a different judge...
they are different - and can depend on the day...second hearing we had a judge who ahdnt read reports etc and automatically asssumed i was nasty bitter ex just trying to prevent contact.... (similar story his depression, dv, kids didnt want to see him unsupervised etcetc).
a year later, another hearing, same judge - and now plenty of evidence that i was reasonable he was not...
make sure the Ss report gets submitted to court in time and have a copy for you and your solicitor.
get any police reports, crime numbers etc to submit as evidence that he is a threat.
the judge will NOT order SS to take kids away - first it is very expensive for SS to take kids into care and lots of procedures to go thru!!
and secondly you are actively workign with SS and they are happy with your care.
so - keep working with SS, express your concerns to your social worker and make sure that the report submittted by Ss is very clear.
any school etc reports showing how they have settled may be important too.
you can make it clear you willing for supervised contact at a contact centre - subject to the children agreeing.
make it clear that while you appreciate right sof childrne to knwo their father and for contact to take place you ahve serious concerns and as there has been time without contact and kids fearful, it needs to be supervised, observved, assessed and gradual.
make it more about concern about how the kids are reacting to idea of seeing him and state any specific police reports, crime reference numbers etc.
yes you need to show you doing everything to allow contact adn for it to happen but there are serious concerens therefore it can only be properly supervised and with willingness for him to work with the children to address their concerns and fears.
state you want proper professionals involved - make it clear you happy for them to be seen by professional family therapist to get their views. but that you are concerned about emotional damage to them from seeing him .
so stick to supervised contact is what you will agree to, given theconcerns. this shoudl also helptn eh kids - you can explain dad wants to see you but it will be aranged in special centre with someone else there at all times that you can go to if you have any issues.
our local contact centre offers for example -
Assessment / Supervised Contact - Referrers info
This is a process to be used when both parties are locked in dispute over the issue of contact and where there is prolonged conflict due to concerns about substance abuse, domestic violence, mental health issues, abduction and possible child abuse/neglect etc. Additionally it can be used when a child has not seen their natural parent for a considerable length of time, or are confused as to whether they want to have contact.
The Assessment will be co-ordinated and managed by trained workers within the Accord, who will work as part of a team.
In order for any referral to be processed:
It will need to be Court ordered.
The Court should also be asked for leave to disclose all of the relevant papers to the Accord Centre.
Unless the parties are paying for the assessment themselves, Legal Aid will need to be applied for. (Please contact us for more details).
Once a completed referral, the Court Order and relevant papers have been received by us, together with a Letter of Authority for the Legal Services Commission, in respect of payment for the intended Assessment, the case can then be forwarded for allocation.
On allocation, both parties will be invited, separately to attend an initial assessment meeting. The purpose of such a meeting is:
To introduce the Accord?s team of workers
To outline the process of the assessment and the rules concerning any contact undertaken.
To discuss the parents concerns about undertaking the assessment.
To agree availability for future meetings.
If either party does not attend this meeting the matter will have be referred back to Court.
When the initial meetings have taken place, the team will contact the referring solicitor to indicate the proposed date for filing the Court Report in order that an appropriate date can then be arranged for a further hearing.
Once the Assessment process has commenced, we would undertake only minimal communication with referrers, as we wish to ensure issues arising from the assessment are resolved within the Centre