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late drop off keep my company

9 replies

norksinmywaistband · 08/11/2009 17:17

First time h has had the dc since he dropped the bombshell his has been having an affair for at least 9 months ( we have been separated but still, this makses it a whole other ball game)

He was meant to drop the DC off at 5pm, at 4.58 got a text to say he won't drop them off til 6.

Why!!!

so controlling of hm, he knows I will now be pacing for an hour, especially as he has told the DC today that he will never be coming home

OP posts:
ilove · 08/11/2009 17:18

Stick the kettle on, I need a coffee...

ChasingSquirrels · 08/11/2009 17:21

hang in there, that last hour can be crap, especially when you were expecting them.

norksinmywaistband · 08/11/2009 17:26

Drunk my coffee, but plenty more here if you need it.

He has been such an arse today - let the dc with his mother tocome back and change car for van - had to knock and tell me what he was doing.

Bought van back - knocked to ask what arrangements for during the week would be. He got angry when I said he can see the children either on tues and thurs or on wed eve but he was not going to have them here( which he has done til now) Then announced thats ok I will take them to OW's house especially as his flat is closer than hers

OP posts:
ChasingSquirrels · 08/11/2009 17:27

the OW thing is separate, you can let it tear you apart, or you can rise above it.

stick to the children and arrangements.

not long until 6pm (mine are back at 6.30pm)

norksinmywaistband · 08/11/2009 17:30

I am trying hard for it not too, but I also know he was only saying it to hurt me.

How old are yours squirrels?

OP posts:
ChasingSquirrels · 08/11/2009 17:33

7y and 3y9m.
We separated 19mo ago - he said couldnt live with me any more (after 17 yrs). He has been seeing someone else since at least Jan this year, and I wonder if they were together before.

It does get easier.

norksinmywaistband · 08/11/2009 17:40

Mine are 3&4, Similar here together nearly17 years, he left in Feb saying noone else was involved he told me n Wed that him and OW hae been together physically since he left and emotionally for a lot longer

OP posts:
norksinmywaistband · 08/11/2009 17:42

Think I can hear the car - thanks for keeping me company

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jaquelinehydeTheBonfireToffee · 08/11/2009 17:43

My exH always brings DS back late unless there is somewhere he really wants to go or be, then it's bang on time.

One weekend DS needed to be back at X time to go to a party tea at Grandmas house, exH knew all about it and agreed to have him back on time. Said time came and went, I rang and was told we are on our way. 40 mins later they arrived and DS had been taken to Macdonalds on the way. When I asked why when he knew he was going to a party, I got told "The boy said he was hungry, so I stopped to get him some food"

Rise above it, remain calm and show no sign of being bothered. If when he drops the DC's off the hour is mentioned, just laugh and say it was fantastic an unexpected hour to yourself it was pure relaxation. However, it will have thrown the bedtime routine off so you had better get going. Then either shut the door, or usher him out quickly.

Keep calm and in control, nothing fazes you and life is great. Break down when he has gone if you need to, but never in front of him.

HTH

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