I have been with my fiance for a year now. I met him a year and a half after the father of my 2 kids left. He is intelligent and funny, is nice to the kids (and they like him), leaves discipline to me, buys me flowers and a magazine every week, has made great improvements to the house and seems very committed. This week he asked me if he could move in. Although I'd always thought I'd say yes, I ended up saying, 'can we leave it for a bit'?
He was really miserable last night. He said I'd let him down, although today he apologised for sulking and said we could do whatever made me happy. A few things have happened which have made me question our relationship, such as a row a month ago, started by me, but which ended in him pushing me (not hard, but I have been in a violent relationship and am a bit scarred by it). He never goes out, has no male friends, no family and his hobbies are just computer games and reading. I love him but I won't be pushed around, and I do wonder if he is depressed. I am not a subservient woman and I am not afraid to be single. To be fair though, I have given him a lot of grief, it has been 'my way or the high way' for a long time. I have finished with him 3 or 4 times when I felt like I couldn't cope with a relationship. I don't know. How does this sound to you? I am considering counselling as I know I struggle with even minor rejections. I didn't live with my family from age 11 but that's another story. I don't want to be so hard that I can't let anyone in, but I don't want to make a mistake either. My son was 3 when his dad left and it affected him deeply. I don't want the same thing happening again. We'd be living in my house so I am secure in that way. Any thoughts on this would be greatly appreciated...