How the heck do you manage the competing needs/demands of more than one child?

[h20]

Have been on my own since last Christmas.Husband now gone and hardly bothers seeing kids. Two boys, aged 2 and 4. If I just have one of themwith me it seems like a breeze - I enjoy the one-one time and feel that I am doing a good job and am in control. Together however, most outings are fraught and I don't seem to be able to do anything quality with either of them at home. Younger boy is super active, have to get out with him but then I spend lot of time managing his behaviour and the elder one doesn't get the help/attention that he needs. The 2 yr old wreaks any painting/jigsaw/train-set making with the older one. Am spending quite a bit of time thinking I can't do this and that I am fundamentally unsuited to parenting and i end up wanting to cry pathetically in the loo. Bit late now.... Any ideas?? (apart from personality transplant)

h20,

You are not crap! You have been doing a really tough job by yourself and you will get there.

Would it help if you had some one on one time with each of your children?

Could you put the 2 yr old to bed 3omins earlier so you can spend individual time with ds1?

Good Luck

your doing great.

it'll get easier once the older is in school.

does the older go to preschool yet.

i find those couple of hours with my younger really makes all the difference. mines are 2 an 3yo