Alone, for the first time in 16 years.....

[norksinmywaistband]

Dh told me at the weekend that we are going to separate as he does not love me anymore. This came as a total shock as I thought that things were begining to improve, from his detatched behaviour which I had mistakenly put down to a bit of a mid life crisis.

Anyway, He is leaving as soon as he can organise somewhere to live, And I will be here with 2 small children, no Job( currently sahm) and no idea where to go from here.

I have had a brief look at entitled to . com which has been recommmended in other threads, but am unsure how I go about getting these benefits, where do I apply to how long does it take etc.

I have sorted an independant bank account this morning as a first step.

Feel I am floundering, I am emotionally devastated, yet am the one having to run around and be practical

contact your local citzens advice. they will tell you what your entitled to and help you get a local solicitor that legal aid friendly if you need one.

i found sites like entitled.com was really useless for SAHM.

citzens advice can help organise appointments with job centre and give you relevant contact details for in your area.

they will give you all forms and help you fill them out.

thanks I will contact them

Phone 08000 556688 to make a claim for income support. They will also take your details re housing and council tax benefit. So will get the ball rolling with them aswell. Sorry generalising there as im not sure f your housing situation. They will also take details of your dh to pass onto CSA. Unless they changed that with the new maintenance/IS rules. The call takes around 45 minutes.

Inform CTC as there is a change in circumstances. They will cease the current claim and send out the forms for your new details.

If i think of anything else ill come back.
HTH

Thanks shellylou, I am in owner occupied, Dh and I are open and ameniable so didn't want to involve Csa if it could be helped. If you come to a private arrangement, do they have to be involved

Sorry, DO I have to wait until the day he leaves the house to make the claim???

You can let them know when you make the claim that DH and yourself have come to a private agreement for maintenance and the figure thats agreed on. DH will have to write a letter confiriming the amount and frequency. They may want details anyway so they can do a calculation of what he should be paying.

I dont know how owner occupied would be affected with HB and CTB.

Im not sure if you can make the claim before he leaves. I wouldnt ahve thought so but could phne them up to find out.

you can claim while still living together. then they amend the amounts once he moves out.

csa can arrange a private agreement too. just tell dh your using them as a mediator and that way you wont be getting his back up about it.