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what can i do if my kids don't want to go to their fathers house

2 replies

madcatxx · 17/02/2009 03:25

my kids age 7 and 10, started seeing their father again after him having no contact for 2 yrs, theres no court order in place just a mutual agreement reached at the court before we saw the judge.

at first things were fine they saw him every fortnight from 1-5 at my parents house, then in jan, they saw him at his parents, and he brought along the wife and his 3 kids hes got with her, age 4,2.5, and 1.5, since they have been there twice, my son refused to go there on the next visit he's 10, and since my daughter came back after the last visit on her own she now refuses to go.

the reason are slowly coming out, my son , does'nt want to know his half siblings and has overheard his stepmother, calling his sister fat and ugly, when she thinks no one is around, and my daughter no longer wants to go, because the 2 eldest of her half siblings are calling her fat and ugly, and at 4 and 2 they have had to have heard this from someone much older, eg their mother.

they also don't want to go becasue their father no longer spends any time with them, on a one to one basis and are just left to it.

what can i do, apart from cause a right stink,next time i go to court, i don't want them getting upset any more and their father trys forcing them to go, but i blieve they are old enough to say no, and think them being forced is against their basic human rights, any one any advice or ideas

OP posts:
alipiggie · 17/02/2009 03:47

Sigh - it's awful isn't it. My two struggle to go and stay overnight with their father. To be honest in our case I think it's because he's living in what was our family home. I can totally understand why they don't want to go and as such I wouldn't make them either. He should make a special time for them, they are his children as well as the other children their half-siblings. Could you arrange for their father to take just them out for a special day somewhere or maybe lunch just so they get some one-on-one time in a neutral location without the others being around. If he doesn't agree then I'm afraid plain talking is required for him.

madcatxx · 17/02/2009 09:13

oh that eill be fun he does'nt understand plain talking and whats best for the kids, its whats best for him , what he wants and what his wife dictates. no with him its going to hard ball talking. we will see what this wknd brings

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