so ex finally rings, and dd answered the phone to him, but

[piratecat]

after arranging with her to meet next sat, should he not have spoken to me.

Or is he being

a, defiant
b, cowardly
c, an arsehole

I feel that i shuold say something, but then again i can't be fucked, but at the same time am angry. This is the first contact arrangememt since december.

i hate feeling like a mug. slap me and give me words of 'rising above it' please.

ta
dd is 6

I'd be pissed off too - you might ahve had something arranged that you now either have to cancel or be the big bad guy and tell your dd she can't see her dad. Just text him saying that arrangements are fine on this occassion but in future can he please confim with you please in case you have plans. Don't add 'you twunt' to the end of it tho - no matter how tempted you are. BTW he is being a,b and c.

a b and c

As well as deeply disrespectful. It is not acceptable for him to make arrangements with a six year old. My mother used to do this to me, so I briefed my DC's that if Nanny tried to arrange them going to see her, they had to check with me first. It means I can't be bypassed and then have to argue with her about it or grudgingly accept it, but there's no direct confrontation about it - they'll say "hang on a minute nanny - mummy, can we go to her's on saturday?" It makes it quite clear who is in charge. She hates it.

i am forever astounded, god knows why, at his behaviour. the extremes are sometimes more than i could ever conjure up iyswim.

nothing should surprise me but it always does. that feeling of feeling always stitched up, are eating away at me.

have just told dd to check with me next time.

On this occasion i will bite my tongue. why, becuase i am scared of his reaction.

it's bloody pathetic i know.

no wine in the house. bah!!

You have to ask him to confirm arrangements. Can you not distort the facts and say says you rang and sid oclock on knowing that it is wrong so he has to ring back and make sure it's right.