Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Flip

Original poster

Scared I'll never get to have anymore kids..anyone else?

14 replies

greeneyedgirl · 11/12/2008 12:24

Hi, just musing really. Just divorced and have been in a relationship with my current dp for nearly a year. Things haven't moved on the way I would have hoped, but that's a whole other thread lol.

I am 34 years old with a beautiful dd (nearly 4) and it makes me terribly sad to think that I probably will not get to have anymore kids. The clock is ticking for me, but I don't want to get pregnant to satisfy my broodiness IYSWIM, I want to have more with someone who loves me completely.

I suppose I am thinking like this because it's Christmas, but just wondered if anyone else feels the same, I feel so bloody old lol!

OP posts:

0987654321 · 11/12/2008 12:41

yes. totally. so much so that I was considering sleeping with xh to try to have another one even though I would never go back to him

I am also 34 with a 2 yr old, and desperately want another, preferably close in age too, but am totally single at the mo

mankymummy · 11/12/2008 12:44

i always thought if i had kids i'd have a huge family, four or more but just have DS (who is totally gorgeous). no chance for me having any more...

tessofthedurbervilles · 11/12/2008 12:46

you have still got time but I guess what you haven't got time for is a relationship that isn't right....

muffins · 11/12/2008 14:03

I'm exactly the same and I'm only in my twenties, have one gorgeous DS who is 18 months old. Good to know I'm not alone!

Original poster

greeneyedgirl · 11/12/2008 14:53

It's really pants isn't it? I guess we just have be to even more grateful for the gorgeous babies we do have!

OP posts:

MincePirateCat · 11/12/2008 17:00

me too i am coming up to forty.

VinegarSantaGropedMyTits · 11/12/2008 17:04

I know how you feel, im 36 and have ds1(19) and ds2(2) but would love another

Single now though so probably no hope for me

IllegallyBrunette · 11/12/2008 17:05

Me too, although I am gradually becoming less bothered about it. Either that or I am forcing myself into denial.

singingtree · 11/12/2008 17:08

Actually, I think you have got time, but as tess said, you haven't got time for a relationship that isn't right. I know someone who re-married and had a second child in her late thirties. Obviously, nothing is certain, but it's totally possible. If the relationship isn't developing as you would like, perhaps it's time to move on?

ELOB · 02/01/2009 14:22

well, first of all, your only 34. i had my 1st child at 34, then my next at 36, then my next at 39. you are already the age i was when i first started having children and you already have 1! so i wouldn't worry about the age thing at all. whats important, especially after divorcing is that the person you choose to have more children with also wants children with you, you trust, respect and love them and feel the same from them. dont rush into it.

LiffeyAnnaLivia · 02/01/2009 14:26

Is the man you're with now a Mr Right for the night kind of guy and it's just rumbling on and on? Maybe he's preventing you from meeting somebdy who'd be there for you long term...

I haven't had a sniff of Mr alright for half an hour mind you. But.... don't feel any urgency because I don't want more children, thank god, there is freedom in that. I only have two, but I feel my focus has shifted to sorting out my own life!

Pinkchampagne · 02/01/2009 14:58

I wouldn't worry too much yet as 34 isn't old. I was pretty much that age when I separated from ex h & went on my first date with my DP when I was nearly 35. I am 36 now & feel very much that DP is someone I want to stay with. It is early to think children yet (we have been together nearly a year & a half), but I certainly haven't ruled out the idea of having one with him - I don't feel I am over the hill just yet!

Pinkchampagne · 02/01/2009 14:58

Agree that you don't want to be wasting your time with Mr Wrong though.

Debra1981 · 08/01/2009 20:44

I've only got one and would love at least one more. It's not so much my clock that's ticking but the fact that I wouldn't want a huge age gap between dd (now 2yo)and any more- there's quite a gap between myself and my siblings and I've always resented being so out of tune with them. However the last thing I want is to do it all again on my own, so I'd rather hang on and make sure it is Mr Right before 'ttc'. And 34 is Not old! But if having more kids is important to you and it's just not going to happen with your current dp, it's probably time to move on.

Flip