Am exhausted, really need dd's dad to have her, even for a few hours, WWYD?

[Pawslikepaddington]

He pays no maintenance and I have no money at the moment. He will only have her if I drive her up to him (250 miles away), I have nowhere to stay so have to drive home again, and then repeat the next day. He won't contribute to petrol and won't have her unless I press him to, so he hasn't seen her since August. We have moved house and I am really struggling with uni atm, I'm up until past 4am some nights with essays, 5 nights a week, and just need a break. Tbh I'm too tired to drive her up anyway, so we would have to do three trains up there, three trains home, and then repeat. How can I get him to even give an inch of leeway, I am just exhausted and have no family that will have her.

Sorry, may have been unclear here - the OP isn't refusing contact by not taking her dd to her father.

What I'm getting at is her dd is the ultimate loser if the father (unreasonably) will not compromise at all and is putting his needs before the child's.

At the moment the OP is putting her dd before herself and is clearly the more thoughtful parent. The father is being an , but it would be a shame if her dd lost out because of this - because it's not her fault, nor the OP's.

The bottom line is the father should make more of an effort than he is doing and it make me very angry to think of a father doing this. He should grow up and act like a responsible parent.

That makes more sense, but it sounds as though the OP's DD could lose out if the OP continues to put her DD first at the expense of her own health and wellbeing anyway.

Otherwise do agree.

I agree with anastaisia, you could look out for a cheap travelodge as sometimes they do a £10 or £15 per night room. If you are going to do the journey paws then maybe limit it to twice a month, your daughter needs a happy healthy mummy to look after her, hope your presentation went well.

They have a beautiful travellodge in Harrogate that sometimes does deals, so that is a possibility-poor dd is so ill this weekend I can't imagine every being able to move her ever again! (That's prob the sleep deprivation talking though!) The only other reservation I have about going up is that she never stays with her dad and he is incontactable for the whole weekend. He has her for an hour when
she arrives and then he takes her to his mum's for the weekend and goes out (he is 30 by the way!), so he doesn't spend any time with her, it is only the grandparents that do, and I pick her up from her grandma's the next day, so it isn' forging a relationship with her father anyway.