why do i just feel numb?

[shelleylou]

Xp has just rang to tell me that he cant see ds. He is blaming it on CSA taking 40% of his wages (his own fault as he didnt send the forms back so CSA had to go through inland revenue) and because of this he cant afford to have ds. If he does he risks losing his house. Apparently had an interview on thursday with a financial advisor and has only told me today when he was surposed to pick ds up on friday. Im not sure if i believe this as it was less than 2 weeks ago he told me that some people have told him not to see ds.
What i dont get is it doesnt bother me hes not having ds. Don't know if its cos ive been expecting it ashe went months without seeing ds and has seen him 4 out of 5 visits since he started again. I should feel somthing right?

he's lying. But you already know this, because he is, after all, a complete twat. That's why you don't feel anythin - you are Over Him.

Ps does he realise that if tell the CSA he no longer has your ds overnight, they will actually take MORE money?

what a cock... your probs just in shock. sorry i cant be of much help. Sounds awful but maybe its for the best?

I usually feel upset for ds with him not seeing xp. Hes been asking for his daddy all week and it hasnt bothered me at all. Colditz he is a complete twat cant argue with that. He does realise hell have to pay more it was a difference of £7 (recently went to taking into account him having ds every other weekend) but at the moment hes contesting it as he reckons hes paying too much. Something to do with a wage they included to make the calculation was far more than normal as he did 21 hours over time

He will have to pay, whether he see's ds or not. He should know this! The more he see's him, the less he has to pay as this is classed as shared care.

Charlotte he does it quite often have a search theres a few thread about problems ive had with him. Even invited him to stay here for a few weekends so he could see ds as i wanted ds to have a relationship with him. Today i just really dont care. Maybe ive come to the realisation that the only constant ds will have in his life is me and my family.

He reckons he cant afford £20.70 for a return on the train to see ds would mean him staying at mine for that though. This is the guy that reckons it costs £80 for a 240mile journey

Don't believe him about the 40% it's most likely to be shite and 15% probably seems like 40% to a twunt

I hate it when ex's equate money and being present for their child in some mind boggling, value devoid, senseless math in their twatty heads

grrrr

thats a load of bull.... whats he driving... an army tank?

I know how much hes having to pay each week CSA have actually told me and it's a fair amount. I find it quite amusing as its his own fault but he wont accept that.
He even told me that he cant afford to get ds a birthday present (its just over a week) or ds and his dd a christmas present. So wont be coming for that but is going to see if his mum will pay for petrol as she might want to see ds on his birthday. I hope not or ill have to have my parents here all day i cant cope with her this year, she ruined it last year.
No hes not charlotte hes just full of shit

sounds like he just can't be bothered with your child which is very sad for the child involved but dont let this man mess with his head coz it just aint fair. Say bollox to him and move on. You might meet another man in the future who in time might become a great dad to your baby. Anyone can be a sperm donar dad but a dad is someone really special. good luck hun

I wont allow him to mess with ds's head luckily he wont have a huge amount of understanding as he is coming up to 2. I have friends who are more of a dad to him. Ds will be fine he has plenty of male role models and my family adore him. Thanks