I officially hate being single

[beansmum]

Yes there are loads of good things about being single, making all the decisions, being so close to ds, not having to shave my legs...but I have finally had to admit to myself that actually it pretty much sucks. I am beginning to find it difficult to be happy for all my friends and family who are all starting to settle down and I don't like being so bitter. I had a dream last night that my sister broke up with her lovely boyfriend and dream me was happy about it. Please reassure me that I am not old and hideously unattractive and I am not going to be single forever!

right Beansmum, stop it RIGHT NOW. You are talking yourself into feeling crap, its like self hypnosis.

I completely agree with comments that society is geared towards couples; I've certainly felt pressure from all sides to couple up and felt inadequate because I wasn't in a relationship.

but then i remembered all the horrible times, the loneliness, the unkindness from some ex partners and I realise that if I hadn't been in such a hurry to couple up I probably wouldn't have touched those losers with someone elses' barge pole.

There is a saying; you never see the torn lining of another's coat. All these happy couples you see on tv, in your daily life... you have NO idea what is really going on and how miserable and stunted I bet a lot of their lives really are.

You sound as though you might be slipping into depression. It might help to get some counselling? Somebody neutral who you could just talk to and get your fears into perspective. When you feel a bit more positive you can start investigating the many, many ways there are to meet people.

Please don't beat yourself as you are at the moment. Please be kind to yourself.

There will be plenty of people at uni who aren't 18 and you will meet some fab people and have a whole new social life.
What course are you doing?

I'm not depressed, I'm just unhappy. I think I'm a bit stressed, we're moving to NZ at the end of Jan and I'm not ready at all. And my course (law and english) starts 3 weeks after we arrive and I'm scared.

I supppose I always thought I would meet somebody once I started working, but that's going to be another 5 years now! Please ignore me, I am absolutely fine, just needed to moan.

Moan away.

Personally though I think you are ever so brave. I could never do what you are going to do.

You will meet lots of new people and make new friends and before you know it you will be so busy that mn will be a distant memory