ANY ADVISE ON HOW TO HANDLE A VERY MESSY ACCESS CASE

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I wondered if anyone could give me any help or encouragment about a court case I am deaing with? I'll try wrap this up quickly but I don't think there's much chance of that!! Here goes: My daughter is five yrs old and her father has made things difficult from the word go, he cheated, bullied and generally frightened the life out of me up until dd was one year old and I finally left, it's been a tough time, mainly because the more he saw me get my life back on track the more trouble he caused, resulting in me getting an injuction against him. he was unreliable with contact plans, and continued to be aggressive all the while maintaining that he loved his daugher ( i don't doubt this but he has never appreciated her routine ) It ended up that he was no longer present at collecion times as he continued being aggressive with me. Every time he has kicked off I have sent him a letter outlining the impact it had on leah, and also myself, I have also kept a record of the stuff he has done. Also warned that if behaviour contiued would ultimately lead to me stopping contact. Well it's got to that point now and I've been to a solcitor to say I wanted a court order, she said she didn't believe this was right course of action to take as open to change at any time etc, she said best to go for full court hearing,they will look nito police record, any witnesses to his behaviour .. which is where we are at now. Trouble is I am really struggling with it all and don't fee like I have the strength to carry on. I panic that he will lie about me, what if the courts beleive him? I still don't even know what will happen at the end of all this- What does the judge/cafcass decide? do they stipulate contact plans for the future? Any advise would be great as I am turning into a nervous wreck!!!!!! xxxx

I am not sure i can give you any constructive advice, just to say, stick to your guns and dont let this bully intimidate you, unless he has hard evidence, any lies he tells in court will be hearsay anyway, if the courts to allow him contact in the future at least he will be bound by the courts to stick by this, that means he wont be able to bully and control you anymore, hoepfully someone with better advice will come along soon, good luck

Hi hope I love your name and think if you maintain that positivity things will be ok.

Court is unpleasant and can always go in any direction. The thing to do though is stay grounded and make sure that you put your point across clearly. Dont say too much either and certainly dont talk about stopping contact yet. Judges make decisions on the day and you cannot foresee the result.

Be strong and stick to your guns about his behaviour dont be intimidated and be clear about what it is you want. Think about a best position and what you are prepared to accept in reality. Always have a best and acceptable because most of the time court is not people facing each other but about sitting in rooms bargaining and then going in front of the judge with the outcome.

I hope this is helpful but honestly stay on here and ask for support because I got wonderful support here through two years of hell.