My ex partner who I left two years ago has just rang and ..

[nolongeraworriedmummy]

said he has bought some furniture and drawers for us, I thought he meant for me to use for dc but nooo he means for him and me, He has also bought furniture for dcs bedroom at his house and said he just needed to buy bedding and toys now.

Im really worried now because dc dont stay there. dc are frightened of staying there and ex doesnt have unsupervised contact for a variety of reasons, we have been split two years because of his voilent behaviour. He knows I am never going back.

Im terrified hes going to take them now

Hi nlwm, sorry you feel so worried by your exp.

If he has supervised contact surely he cannot take them. It may be worth while talking to a solicitor about where you stand and hopefully the supervised access is safe for the children, I am not familiar with the supervised access facilities.
You could always ask him why he has bought the furniture if he has supervised access, but obviously if he is still prone to angry out bursts, it may be best not to say anything to him.

Hi NLAWM

So sorry to hear this, hope that you are doing OK
I would ring a solictor immediately and the Domestic Violence Helpline who may be able to suggest a sympathetic solictior in your area as well as some advice about other measures you could take.

Does your police have a domestic violence unit? If so talk to them.

Would you consider things like a panic button? Also let the kids school know that you are specifically worried about their father and discuss pick up arrangements with their teachers.

I don't want to make you feel more worried but I would take his behaviour as threatening in nature as he is acting like you have no say and is being irrational.

let us know how you get on, thinking of you

Hmm do you have some sort of restraining order on him, perhaps it's time to initiate one? Or is he perhaps doing this to intimidate you - which is what it is doing?

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oh sweetheart
i have no real advice sorry but do agree you should talk to domestic violence unit at police station and get the visit recorded.

violence in a relationship is not on, it never will be and i am sorry to hear of your problems. i am not sure what to say as i dont have personal any experience in violent relationships but my brother had a violent partner once and he now has a restraining order against her as she was so nuts. have you though about getting one of these?

Hi ya i agree with the others your ex sounds as if he has mental health issues, its best to act now as you said there was violence involved i work with mental health people this is the calm before the storm there are signs you look out for such as this odd behaviour goodluck