Yesterday I saw Ds2's father, and feel awful now

[Flightlite]

It was in a shop - he works there but I usually go at weekends when he doesn't seem to be around.

I thought I was fine but since I saw him (he didn't see me - I was trying to hide my face) I keep getting flashbacks of how horrible he was to us, and it's making me worry about my feelings towards my baby. I've not seen his dad since he was born and I have had no problem loving him, but now I look at him and I keep thinking of hsi disgusting father, and can't seem to feel Ok again.

Hs anyone else felt like this? I'm sure it will fade when I haven't seen him for a while but it's so awful -- I dread him ever trying to get access as it will just do me in if I have to have contact with the b*stard.

I just want to forget about him and love our baby, but I;m afraid I won't be allowed to.

I struggled with it a lot when pregnant and coudn't bond with the baby at all, it was only when he was born and ex didn't come to see him that I began to love him. I thought we were doing fine.

How old is your baby? He's a whole new person and not his dad at all. Even if he looks a little like him you will have a huge part in shaping the person he is. Your baby needs you to be strong for him. Don't push him away just because of his dad. he can't help who his dad was/is after all.

Please speak to your health visitor/GP about your feelings and problems bonding with your baby. You are not alone in feeling this way, lots of parents have problems bonding with their baby. But you can get help to deal with it and hopefully overcome it.

best wishes
Gilly