Having men over?

[Lifeasitis91]

I've recently moved 100 miles from London and whilst I have family where I am it's no where near what I have in London however I'm positive I've made the right decision

I'm 34 and I've been single just over 2 years - I went to a single parents group yesterday to mix with the crowd in my new area.
I was talking and explaining I'd recently moved and came onto the subject of dating - one woman just straight out said "as a lone parent you take whatever opportunities you get and if that means having a man in the house while dating and kids are asleep then go for it"
I was expecting others to gasp in shock but the 4 women I was talking to all admitted after the first few dates they had these men in their homes when the kids were in bed and 1 woman had 7 year relationship come from one.
I obviously was taken aback as I had family and friends in London to watch my DD but my options are now less (I have my aunt, uncle cousin and my dad's cousins family here) my aunt and uncle aren't old (both 61) and have offered to watch DD and I do plan to go back to London once a month for the weekend

However - how do I navigate all this I would love to find love again

I think you wouldnt have a man stay over

But a sesh when the kids are in bed is fine imo, then he goes home

My pet peeve is lone parents having a string of men/women over whilst their kids are home. Asleep or not. Had a parent who has a long string of partners I woke up to find or felt awkward around and my other parent had a strict no dating in the home policy, I never met a partner of theirs and I respect and appreciate that and always have. My home growing up was kept sacred and safe.

No I wouldn’t, as a lone woman with children I just wouldn’t take the risk of a man I didn’t know extremely well in my house. Just no, it’s downright irresponsible imo.

@hotmumshit I wouldn't really want a man over just for sex, it was more along the lines is this normal practice if you are at a loss for sitters as a lone parent
@Bringemout I'm the same, I would find it really strange I wouldn't invite a man I didn't know to my home as a single woman let alone with my DD in the house especially after a few dates
Months maybe but not 2 or 3 dates that's less than a month

Oh fair enough 😩 ignore my slaggy thoughts xx

I couldn’t do this and have been single 4 years now. I have teen boys - I’m sure they find out and be absolutely thrilled 😆 I actually wouldn’t risk it, not that I’d ever trust another man again lol

This is very common, im on loads of single parent Facebook groups and they all admit to doing it. Some even take their kids on dates because they have no one to watch them (and yes im talking first dates!!) I wouldn’t do it but it’s “normal” as in common for single parents usually followed by “I deserve a life too” “im not putting my life on hold till they’re 18”

I’ve never had a man over when my kids were home.

But I’ve also never introduced any man to my kids either.

I just think it depends on the person. To each their own. But with the kids in the house, I’d be very cautious having a man over.