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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

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Original poster

OMG

73 replies

PurpleOne · 23/06/2008 20:21

It transpires that I now have a date on Wednesday.

I haven't got a clue what to do - as my last date was absolutely years ago.

Can dye my hair tomorrow, but haven't got anything half decent to wear. (owing to a bit of a drink problem, I piled on the pounds)
We are meeting in the daytime for safety reasons. He does not have any of my phone numbers although I have his. He doesn't even have my proper email address which is good.

Am in a mad panic now, feeling a bit paranoid about my beer belly too.

Any hints or tips that you lovely ladies care to share?

OP posts:

sillybillybee · 26/06/2008 10:31

Purple sooo glad it went well The question is are you as keen as him??

Original poster

PurpleOne · 26/06/2008 15:01

Good question SBB.

I like him a lot although I don't feel that I fancy him? YKWIM? I think he's keener than me though. He wants to speak on the phone every day but told him I don't mind the odd phone call but every day to me, seems a little too much.
Just feels weird. Am not used to all this attention!. If nothing develops over time I feel he could be a very good friend.
Watch this space! LOL

OP posts:

Original poster

PurpleOne · 26/06/2008 23:45

After a first date, he is now ringing and texting every day.
He's good to talk to. BUT would you ladies find that acceptable - after you've said every other day for contact is fine?

And he's talking about sex too.

And I'm worried about the drink problem. I never said anything about that, but he did say he drinks most nights, which I'm not happy about, as I'm still doing reduction therapy. He may enable me?

Just worried, as I'm new to all this.....

OP posts:

davidtennantsmistress · 27/06/2008 09:05

tbh i'd be annoyed that he was ignoring your wishes not to call, and for me that would be a deal breaker. (i'd ask him to leave me alone for a few days and then not answer his calls etc.) but then i'm quite mean, and also like a lot of personal space.

the drinking - i'd proceed with caution there. but if you feel like it could potentially be a prob for you I wouldn't entertain it - better to clip it in the bud now so to speak.

sex talk - well to an extent I think it depends, if it's smutty banter with an underlying suggestion, then I wouldn't be so fussed (but that's just me) and if I feel it's too much or getting crude as in his choice of wording/going into details etc etc then I would have to say enough is enough i'm not that sort of a lady - as in I like the smutty banter but not all the time, and it certainly doesn't mean i'll jump into bed with them on the second date!

Original poster

PurpleOne · 28/06/2008 14:48

He rang me last night, absolutely slaughtered.
I fished for answers without giving too much away on my end. He was drinking 8 Grolsch, said he could easily do 3 bottles of wine in one sitting.
Then he said he was gonna roll up a bifta for bedtime. Yet on his POF profile, he said he didn't drink or do drugs.

It wasn't smutty banter IMVHO. He said he had a hard one and wanted what was in my knickers! I haven't even known him a week yet.

I don't have much space in my life for a drinker like that, and I'm not comfortable with the way the conversations are going.

OP posts:

chocolatespiders · 28/06/2008 14:51

if you are not comfortable then that speaks volumes to me.....

tell him to jog on.... so you can get a new date planned..... he doesnt sound like he is the man for you... but there will be others....

I got stood up this weekend.... says he has family probs with his 15/16 year old girl....

Pinkchampagne · 28/06/2008 14:55

Oh no, I wouldn't like that at all - I would be put off immediately!
The drinking doesn't sound good either (I like a drink myself, but sounds like he drinks far too much on a regular bases), so I would have to stop this relationship before it started & move onto the next one!

Snaf · 28/06/2008 16:29

Oh, grim. He sounds revolting, tbh. Wrong on every level. Bin him - plenty more out there

Pinkchampagne · 28/06/2008 16:48

I agree with snaf. I have been with my DP for the best part of a year now, and he would never say revolting things like that to me, never mind after only having met once. I would bin him right away & look for a better catch!

davidtennantsmistress · 28/06/2008 17:37

agreed bin him off. (and as I say I don't mind the banter but down right crudeness - get rid asap!) what is it with some men?? I had an email today saying 'how are you, pervy slut - or swords tot hat effect - never met the man!'

plenty more fishes in the sea

sorry you were stood up CS.

i'm still set for a coffee tomorrow avo, but watch this space - man's a lot (a lot!!) older than me, and is 6'5 i'm 5'2 so not sure that will work! lol. still seems a nice chap.

noddyholder · 28/06/2008 17:50

cut all ties he will hamper your recovery and sounds a bit of a sicko Get rid of him

sillybillybee · 28/06/2008 19:56

Agree with the other get rid asap.

Original poster

PurpleOne · 28/06/2008 20:43

I am going to cut him off now.

He texted me earlier saying he was lonely, bored and horny. Then 5 mins later a pic message came through of his bloody hard on!

I'm sure he could make a lady feel valued, respected and special...but it certainly won't be with me.

Talk about presumptuous!

OP posts:

davidtennantsmistress · 28/06/2008 20:44

god I hate it when men do that - text back am I suppose to be impressed??

Pinkchampagne · 28/06/2008 20:47

Oh yuk, how horrible! Definitely the right move to get cut off this charmer!

Original poster

PurpleOne · 28/06/2008 20:51

I agree!

I haven't got any credit to text him back with. Like to think I have an open mind but that was just offensive and rude.

I did think that he was a nice man and if things didn't work out, we'd be good mates BUT now I just think he's just a disgusting little wanker.

OP posts:

Snaf · 28/06/2008 20:53

Wat is wrong with these men?!

Snaf · 28/06/2008 20:54

What, even

chocolatespiders · 28/06/2008 22:24

OMG- that is unbelievable.... what does he think you would say to that

ladytophamhatt · 28/06/2008 22:46

God, how revolting.
I'd be horrified if my DH sent a picture messge like that, let alone someone I'd know a week.

Get rid of him ASAP

Original poster

PurpleOne · 28/06/2008 23:43

What worried me the most was the sudden rush for a date.

Don't worry. I'm a survivour of DV, my man radar was on high alert anyway. The sudden rush for attachment and involvement.

Still haven't got any credit and he's not online. Slimy fucking bastard.

OP posts:

Tinkerbel6 · 29/06/2008 10:23

Purpleone he is a weirdo, I wouldnt even text him back as it will encourage him, drop contact and don't answer your phone, he has lied on his profile, ignored your wishes and bombarded you with phone calls, has talked smutty to you and now sending you offensive images via his phonem, anything else and I would consider reporting him

glitterfairy · 29/06/2008 11:12

I agree with Tinkerbel.

He sounds awful.

Some relationships do develop into friendships (which I think my current one is going to) but that is good as you can practice your skills! LOL

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