Page 2 | Looking for another single mum to rent together

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

mumofoneAloneandwell · 10/04/2026 00:31

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 10/04/2026 00:20

Hi op I think it would be a great plan I’d love to live with one of my single mum friends if I had two spare rooms I’d definitely invite them to be lodgers.
The difficulties are, if you private rent it will count as a house of multiple occupancy, housing association it would only be in one persons name, if one of the mums owns the home then it may not feel like a real equal home to the lodger home knowing they could be asked to leave , and it may be scary for the owner mum thinking how could I get rid of them if I needed to or what happens if their kid smashes my windows etc. so there is lots to pre plan like a prenup!!
you could look on spare room for live in landlords to try to find a set up like this but it won’t be stable housing. What would you do if you had to move it might be harder to find somewhere locally alone.
there is a single mums uk Facebook group. I think if you posted areas you’d consider and your budget you MIGHT find another mum with space (only if she’s rich enough to not need to share though probably!) or someone who wants to get a new private rental and would team up with someone.

in the right set up this would be amazing, you could take turns cooking, babysit while the other has nights out etc and the child has a playmate.

Would work well for mums with babies - older children might be harder to make work

This has been done before, i'm sure ive read somewhere

ArtemisNutella · 10/04/2026 00:31

I have a couple of friends who live in this way. Two single mothers, one child each. Both are not pursuing a relationship while their kids are young so it works perfectly for them. They share childcare as one works days and the other works a lot of night shifts. Shared bills. The kids are living like they are siblings. It means they can afford a larger home together than if they were living alone.
The big difference though is that they were already friends. @omika you need to be very careful and very selective if you are going to advertise and make plans with someone you don’t already know. Good luck with it though, I think it can work well.

Lavender14 · 10/04/2026 00:41

TwistedRoses · 09/04/2026 23:26

These comments are interesting as I’ve seen this kind of thing posted before and usually all the comments are saying what a wonderful idea it is! I always thought it sounded bad, new partners, kids not getting on etc

Yeah I agree, a very mixed bag to my mind and a bit of a safeguarding mare. I would worry about the mix of the kids too especially if there's an age difference and if there's been previous trauma etc leading to them becoming a one parent family which you might not know right away ( and I say this as a one parent family myself). I completely get why you'd consider it but you're opening your child up to all the roommate issues of teen years if it's not a good mix and extracting from that can be extremely difficult. For me it was better to secure a job in a different area where housing is more affordable and move here than stay where I was, very difficult at the time and I'm definitely still adjusting but it was the right call. I just think home needs to be where you close the door and feel safe and secure no matter what day you've had.

ee36 · 10/04/2026 08:38

omika · 09/04/2026 14:57

Hi I’m looking for another single mum to share a house and share bills together

What area

Original poster

omika · 10/04/2026 09:28

South east England

OP posts:

Original poster

omika · 10/04/2026 09:29

Thank you

OP posts:

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 10/04/2026 09:29

omika · 10/04/2026 09:28

South east England

OMG you're not being very helpful.
South-east England is vast.

Benjii · 10/04/2026 09:37

Hmm. The vagueness is concerning. I’d caution anyone about contacting strangers like this on the internet. Although, I don’t think anyone on MN is daft enough to do so.

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 10/04/2026 09:39

Benjii · 10/04/2026 09:37

Hmm. The vagueness is concerning. I’d caution anyone about contacting strangers like this on the internet. Although, I don’t think anyone on MN is daft enough to do so.

Hopefully not.
Something feels really off.

FieryA · 10/04/2026 09:42

What's the point of this post? You have provided no details about location, budget, etc. Also, this is not really the right site for housemate finding...

Original poster

omika · 10/04/2026 12:47

Southampton sorry

OP posts:

Original poster

omika · 10/04/2026 12:48

my think is to disclose any details to people that are actually interested no time wasters

OP posts:

FullOfFresias · 10/04/2026 12:51

Op - although I don’t think MN is the right place for you to search for a housemate, if you insist on doing and you are genuine then you really need to give a lot more detail. What area? How many dc? What size house? Budget? Potential length of time sharing? No decent genuine person is going to reply and want to share with you based on your current responses

Original poster

omika · 10/04/2026 16:00

Thank you

OP posts:

Original poster

omika · 10/04/2026 16:01

My point is to provide details in private to the right people. Now what’s the point of your comment?

OP posts:

Original poster

omika · 10/04/2026 16:04

Thank you

OP posts:

IWaffleAlot · 10/04/2026 16:06

Itisallastruggle · 09/04/2026 19:37

You’d have no control on your child being around a complete stranger and being forced to live with a strange child. A lot of kids like to go home and see it as their safe space - not a place where they have to stand on ceremony like they have constant visitors. You would have no say over the other parent having their family and friends over, who could be people you really dislike or aren’t the kind of people you want around your child. As your child gets older and you would normally be able to leave them home alone, you’d have them home with a stranger.

I think it’s one thing living with a stranger as an adult but I’d never do it with kids. Too many opportunities for abuse and for them to feel like home is no longer a sanctuary and place they can relax and be safe.

All of this.

why do you think it’s a good idea? Just because it’s another woman? How do you know if she’s a single mom not due to her own bad choices?
what if the ex is abusive and causes problems at home?

Cant think of a worse idea.

Original poster

omika · 10/04/2026 16:10

thank you

OP posts:

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 10/04/2026 16:26

omika · 10/04/2026 16:01

My point is to provide details in private to the right people. Now what’s the point of your comment?

Who?
You haven't quoted anyone.

Ginger26 · 10/04/2026 18:49

I highly doubt this is a genuine single mum

Chewbecca · 10/04/2026 18:56

It's a good idea. But MN isn't a great place to find a good match to rent with. You need to match the other person on many levels and will need to spend time making sure your needs and family's needs will work together.

Never heard Southampton described as South East England either so the OP and lack of detail does give warning flags.

If I were looking, it would be on local sites, I would introduce myself and a bit about myself and my family and our lifestyle, plus what I am looking for.

BillieWiper · 10/04/2026 20:40

Ilovelurchers · 09/04/2026 23:16

As others have said, it makes much more sense than cohabiting with a new partner, who may expect to have some kind of fake parenting role in your kids' life.

At least it will be clear to all involved that this is an arrangement of convenience (tho it may hopefully lead to friendship also) so it will be much easier and more straightforward to draw up and stick to boundaries, and, as someone else said upthread, to dissolve the situation if it isn't working for all concerned.

You see so many threads on here from people who have tried to blend households with a new partner, and it's been a disaster, but they don't know how to undo it because they still love the partner and want to keep that romantic connection. (I've been in this exact situation myself).

So much better if your are just lodgers sharing accommodation - you could just say, this isn't working, no hard feelings, and dissolve the set-up without heartbreak.

And on the plus side you get all the financial and practical benefits of living with another adult, which are not negligible, and are often mentioned on here by people determined to blend families with a partner.

But what if there are hard feelings? What if one doesn't pull their weight with cleaning communal spaces, or has lots of friends/bfs around who are disruptive? What if the children don't get on well?

People don't just move their kids in with complete strangers and their kids. They would at least have been dating and have plenty of background info on that person and how decent they were. It would be a long and well thought out decision as it would mean being a family.