Can someone explain about fathers being on the birth cerificate?

[littlelamb]

I am going to register ds tomorrow and am wondering wether or not to ask ex dp to come too. Ds is only a week old and he has made it quite clear that he wants nothing to do with him I don't understand the legal implications of him being on the birth certificate- he is not at all responsible, for example, but would him being on the birth certificate give him rights to see ds on his own? (not that I ever expect him to ask) As much as he has made it clear that we will not be parenting ds together I feel a bit sad about ds having to have 'unknown' besides father on his birth certificate- he is not unknown, just being a prize plonker

If you asked ex-dp to go, do you think he would?

I think it has implications for claiming child support and parental responsibility.

For me, I think it's important that the child is formally registered with two parents. As you say, the father isn't unknown - just being a twunt.

But, forgive my ignorance, I'm not sure if unmarried parents have to both be present in order for his name to be included. If not, can you not just include his name?

he has to be present if you want him on there. if he is included he will be legally as responsible for ds as you.

If you're not married you can't put his name on there without him present.

he will have parental responsibility

to include him he must either be present or sign a form to say he agrees.

I have left ds2's father off for the same reasons as you, but it does not say unknown, it is just left blank.

If at any point I want him added on, he can be.

You can still claim from the CSA whether he is on the certificate or not.

I honestly don't know, wotulookinat. He was there at the birth last Sunday and for about a day was absolutely besotted, but since then he doesn't want to know. He did ask at the time if there was any paperwork to be done, like registering him, but since then I have heard nothing from him The only positive I can think, and it does make me feel terrible for looking at it this way, is that if he goes and registers as the father, it should be easier to claim maintenance as he won't be able to dispute paternity, and to be honest he i just the kind of who would try and get out of paying maintenance as long as he could. He has not even bought his son a gift fgs.

Being on the birth certificate would automatically give him PR (parental responsibility). This does not give him any rights as such, but means he has responsibilities as a parent (which he may or may not choose to fulfill).

No being on the birth certificate does not mean he can automatically have access to the child. That is something you as his parents should decide and agree between you and if you can't then you go to court. If he took you to court over contact and he didn't have PR it is likely the court would grant it anyhow to be honest.

If you want him on the certificate, and you are not married, he either has to attend the registra with you or complete a form which has to be stamped and signed by a recognised official.

You might try and persuade him if he is reluctant by saying that this is an official document that your child will refer to throughout his life and think about how it would feel not to have your father listed on it. Also point out that not putting his name on the certificate won't make any difference as to him having to pay maintenance so if thats the reason he's refusing he should rethink.

Have you spoken to his parents? My ex's parents were instrumental in persuading him to put his name on the birth certificate.

If this is something you really want don't rush down to the registra. You have plenty of time. Phone the registra and explain the situation and ask them to send you the form. They will make a note that you are waiting on the form and won't keep reminding you until closer to the date you have to register the birth by. Whether you get the form completed, end up going together or on your own it gives you time to work through what you really want here and trying to get him to agree.

Best wishes
Gilly

tbh i dont think the birth certificate makes much difference to claiming money from him. dh is not registered ad dss father but still pays.

The CSA can do a DNA test if he refuses to pay. Involve the CSA now.

I've just thought of another question. Assuming I meet someone in the future and he would like to adopt ds as his own (obviously we are talking hypothetically here, but this is the stuff that really worries me) would it actually be better to not have a father on the birth certificate. Would it make the process easier? Presumably if ex dp was on the birth certificate then he could object?

yes thats correct LL. also he could refuse the otherman from having parental responsibility too.

There really is now rush littlelamb, read up about it some more, even if you register the birth without the father on there, he can be added at a later date. Give yourself the time to make the right decision. (it was my ex's parents that convinced me to leave him off!)