I think i just need reassurance and a plan of action for when the kids return... help!
7 and 3 year old, 7 year old has their birthday party in a few days during my time that I have organised. Kids told their dad yesterday about it, so 35 mins after being dropped off at our neutral handover location I receive a message from dad saying that our 7 year old wants to invite daddy, daddy's girlfriend and daughter and 2 other people who the kids have never mentioned.
Now I know from previous patterns that dad's behaviours are escalating again recently, that the first thing the kids will say to me when they come home, probably as they walk over from his car is 'can daddy come to the party?'
I can't have him there. The CAO states he is extremely emotionally abusive to me, I am not safe around him, and in the last week alone he has accused me of parental alienation and poisoning both kids, and threatened court again. Having dad there opens up my kids having to experience that high conflict coparenting which I don't want, but also my family and all the kids who have been invited.
So what do I do? Do I bite my tongue and give him the invitation? Or do I stick to my gut instinct of daddy can plan a party for his time with the kids?
The only time we spend together is for medical appointments for one child, and dad invited himself to spend the day with us a few weeks ago after the appointment and I had to say no. Eldest was so upset and I was the bad guy, was I wrong?
I will be blamed, the kids will be angry with me, I don't know what to say so I don't speak negatively of their dad or put them in the middle. He speaks negatively about me around the kids and the court said that he wouldn't support a positive relationship with me which limited his time. Help!