Christmas with 1DC

[flummingbird]

Hi everyone

I have been a single mum for 7 years with 1 DD(9). Her DF is no longer involved since this May as she was unhappy at his house and so rather than sort it out he just stopped contact entirely.

This week my thoughts turned to Christmas - previously she would have a day with me and a day with him and family so lots of fuss, but obviously this year it's just me. We have always gone to my mums in the past for xmas day but this year DD wants to have it at home. I invited my mum and step dad but they don't want to come to mine, that want to have it at home. There is nobody else I can ask.

How do I make the day special and not just feel like another Sunday at home with a roast?? Is it possible, or will it all just end up feeling a bit flat? Can anyone that has done it before just help boost me up and tell me it'll all be ok?

Well... it's ages away yet so there's plenty of time for you to talk to your DD about how you both could make it a special time just the 2 of you, crafting decorations/ watching favourite films/ ice skating (I don't know what's available near you or what she's into)/ Christmas markets/ shopping together for special food to put by, baking etc. I had several Xmases entirely alone with DS when he was small and they were some of the best - I could get loads of surprises squirreled away and no dashing about between various family factions...

Thanks - it's more the actual day itself that's bothering me. Other than opening presents, how do you make it different from any other weekend day, if you know what I mean?

Also your child has only just stopped seeing her father, he may well re appear, especially over Xmas!

Do you have any plans for Xmas eve/ Boxing Day? If not maybe see if you can go to panto, a movie, see Xmas lights. Basically make those days busy so that you appreciate being at home on xmas day.

if it were me and dd, I’d probably get up, open stockings (leave big presents), make a nice breakfast, get ready, go for a walk with dog and to local pub for 1 drink and to soak up the atmosphere, back home let dd open a present or two to keep her occupied while I finish dinner bits, open some more presents, have dinner, light the fire, have a bath, new pj’s then snuggle up with a movie and nice sweet treats.

my dd is not a big Xmas dinner fan so I’d probably make her favourite- lasagne 🤣

This is how I would plan the day OP it it was me:

Open stockings in the morning and have a fancy mocktail Bellini
Christmas breakfast - fruit, pastries, continental cheeses etc
Morning walk, hopefully in the snow!
Come back and open presents with Christmas music on in the background (actually Christmas songs on all day!)
Make Christmas dinner together for early afternoon, pull crackers, read jokes etc
Spend some time looking at/playing with gifts
Facetime family members
Play a selection of board games, maybe have a mini tournament
Evening - pick a lovely Christmas film to watch whilst eating snacks/leftovers

I really hope you have a lovely day ❤️

That sounds lovely, thank you 😊

Mocktails are a fab idea that I would never have come up with!

You can make it a fab day with exactly what you and DD want!

Pancakes for breakfast. You don’t have to have Christmas dinner, you could pick all the bits and bobs you like. Pigs in blankets, mini pizzas, halloumi fries, ice cream for dessert whatever you fancy.

Then all your favourite movies. You could spend the day in fancy pyjamas, get some face masks and cute nail varnish, make slime, play animal crossing or Just dance idk whatever 9 year old girls like to do these days

There’s loads of community events that happen on Christmas Day, if you’re near the coast find a Christmas Day dip at a local beach (join or watch, both are great fun). Any Christmas Day parkruns nearby, or a carol service (if that’s your thing)? If not then see if anything locally, or create your own tradition - we loved a treasure trail or a Christmas themed geocache?