1 week till baby is due and feeling quite sad!

[charlotte121]

Have been attending NCT classes which xp promised to come to but didnt bother to in the end... he went to alton towers instead. The classes were great in giving me confidence in myself for the birth and I met some lovely people there but i also found it really difficult.
All these women had loving caring partners who were really interested in the classes and who you could tell were going to be amazing and supportive to the women during labour and would make loving fathers afterwards. I however have the prospect that xp may not even turn upto the birth. He just isnt interested. I know i cant make him be intrested but i really will need the support and have got myself quite upset at the completely different situation that im going to be in when i have my baby compared with all the women at the NCT class.
I know what to expect of ex by now... he dips in and out of ds's life when he feels like it and has no understanding of what the responsibility of being a dad is. But it really does hurt that i have to do this all alone. Im only 20 so still young and actually never planned on having children untill i had completed my degree found a nice guy got married etc... the traditional pathway, so having kids this way has been quite a shock but has also enriched my life totally. I just never imagined i would have to go it alone. I want someone to be able to appreciate the cute and amaizing things my little ones are doing. Maybe im moaning over nothing... not sure. Im just finding it a bit upsetting atm. Anyone else been through something similar? x

congratulations enjoy every second x

congratulations sweetheart your'e an absolute trooper x x x x.....you know what fuck him, your better than that and you've got us

I did it too...I recall going to a waterpool hire meet and being(yet again)the only one on her own. I did though, have several people loudly congratulate me on my courage to be there alone. I remember the sadness I felt at always being the solo parent, the envy really
You are going to be absolutely fine

As for all those couples in your NCT classes...I attended one of my friends NCT's classes with her as her birth partner and there were altogether 5 expectant mummies there. 4 obviously with their Dh's/Dp's. I know for a fact that 3 of the five ladies there are no longer with their loving partners, so you may actually have the better deal there. At least you know where you are.
Do you have someone who can be with you if he isn't? I'm sure you can find a good friend or family member to be with you who'll support you? I hope so. Good luck.

Ha! should've seen the second part! sorry but......
CONGRATULATIONS!!!! well done! (see, I knew you'd be great!)

Congratulations on your lovely beautiful daughter xxxx

I have been through something similar, although not exactly the same: ex was quite rubbish through out pregnancy (v unsupportive generally, going clubbing etc) then left me and our adorable DD for someone else (once I found out ) when she was 5 months. 3 years later, I met a wonderful man who is now my husband and a fantastic stepdad, and we've had 2 more girls..
I would advise you to give yourself a chance to grieve your relationship before getting serious with anyone else. Give yourself plenty of time to work out what you need in a man, and don't go settling for any old eejit, okay!! (in my case it was 3 years!)

baby is officially named now. I wanted to call he elouise, but ofcourse knob didnt like that and kicked up a fuss as he felt he had a right to have a say on the name, and being knackeered i gave into him.
We have called her Hollie which seems to suit her really well.
here are a few of xp's suggestions.... Britney, stacey and liberty i think not.
we agreed on hollie which my mum suggested and is feeling pleased with herself.
hollie is now nearly a week old and xp has seen her once. Its been so difficult. Have really struggled with the breast feeding and im missing my little boy terribly. Get to see him for a bit each day but its not the same as being with him all day long. he seems to have got so big and grown so much over the past week. been getting quite low as well so im just trying to concentrate on the new baby and keep my energy and mood levels up.
Really do not know how im going to cope with both kids when ds comes bk from my sisters. I had both of them for an hour yesterday and had a total melt down, think my mum got quite worried about me. but was also quite good as my family saw that i was struggling to cope and have picked up the slack for me.
It's ds's birthday on tuesday so its a good excuse to make a big fuss of him.
thanks for all your support. its good to have you lot around when the going gets tough! Charlotte x

Congratulations on your beautiful new little daughter Hollie. I have no experience of what you are going through, but just wanted to say that you sound so strong and a fab mum.

Don't forget to look after yourself, eat and drink properly etc, come on here for support when you need to. xx

aaaaw charlotte you will be fine sweetie....your hormones are everywhere still ath the moment and you are facing the task of raising two children single handedly.
you will cope because you have to...that's all there is to it, your family sound super supportive and im sure they will carry on supporting you along the way ((((((hugs))))) congrats x x

Hi Charlotte. So your ds has grown overnight? Mine did that too. My aunt took care of him when I went in to have dd (mum was my birth partner) and when ds walked in the next day he was 2ft taller and 2 years older (that's how it feels, so strange ).

Try not to worry about how you will cope. My most frightening moment was when I got home from hospital. I remember the feeling so well. Dd was in her car seat. I brought her in and put the car seat on the sofa. The cat came and sniffed her, looked at me as if to say "hang on, what on earth is this?". I looked at her and thought OMG, what do I do now? Her father was long gone, one overwhelming moment when I realised I couldn't turn back. I would say thats a normal feeling to have and it lasted only for that moment. You will cope.

Dd is starting school this year btw and I havent lost the plot yet...well ok, not often

Doh! Congratulations of course!

lol ds had changed from a baby to a todler overnight. he's a prooper little man now. feel like i have missed about 3 months of his life.

big congrats charlotte!! bit late i know, sorry!! hope all is going well for you and both your little ones!! x

congratultion charlotte,

when i was 20 i got preggers with ds my ex dp was a complete arse (think might be their age). he did not want to know about baby at all , until i had hm. he turned up at hospital for ds to be born but i asked him to leave as the room as the bab was brought into the world. it took him a while to realise his responsibilities ( mabe years). we tried again after baby was born but he did not understand his roles. suddenly he changed and doted on us. but unfortunatly id been too hurt.but now 5 years on. he seems to have had a boost up the arse and is a brilliant dad and very hands on. really hpe you al the best its so hard when your young. just dont forget to ask for help if you need itxxxxxx

well done and congrats - i did the whole pregnancy and labour thing alone and i can honestly say the first few months with my son was the happiest i have ever been. enjoy!!