Should I ask sons father for increase for child maintenance

[theressomanytinafeysicouldbe]

I have a 15 year old DS. I split up with his father when I was pregnant. Father already had 2 children with ex wife, went on to have another a year after our was born and marry the mother. He didn't have anything to do with DS until I bumped into him when DS was 3. He decided he wanted to see him, he did so for about 6 weeks and then never bothered again, he paid me 2 payments of child maintenance. Fast forward, his 2 older children are now adults, he has been paying me £100 a month maintenance after I contacted him 2 years ago. He now has my DS and his DD both under 16. I know he and his wife are working and have spent fortunes on new cars and renovated a new house they bought a few years ago, etc. (This is not about what they have spent their money on). I work full time but raising a 15 year old is not cheap and I really want him to increase my child maintenance. I never went through CMS and I know I would have been entitled to more than what I get but was happy to get whatever he was willing to pay (£100 was his suggestion).

I have asked for help once towards a school trip and he said the most he could give me was £100 (The trip was around £600 and then passport and stuff for trip on top but I was struggling).

Anyway my question being do you think its unreasonable for me to contact him and ask him to increase his payment? I know he could just spit his dummy out and stop payments.

If he did stop money, where would i stand with CMS could i put a proper claim in with them? Really don't know what to do

Do you know roughly what he earns? Have a look on maintenance calculator to get an idea of how much he should be paying then you could say cms suggests X amount can you contribute more if he says no then just put the claim in and he has no say over the amount and has to pay

I think he earns around £28k, calculator says around £258 a month 😱

Cms. Today.

He's not been properly supporting his DC for their entire life. Time for him to pay the legal minimum, not a paltry £100 a month.

I have contacted him this morning and he said they are struggling and he can probably stretch to another £20 a month. I daren't go to the CSA in case he stops the money he is paying at the moment

You can approach the CMS at any time and open up a claim. Do this as soon as you can. It's important – because you can't backdate a claim for child maintenance, but once the claim is open you can claim any arrears from the date the claim was made. Your son is 15 now, so you will only be able to get help for the next 3 years. Do it ASAP. It doesn't matter if ex partner spits his dummy over it - it should highlight to him how little he paid over the last 15 years, not how hard done by he will be for the next 3!

I’d definitely contact cms!

Definitely go to the CMS.

But if he stops paying it will be worth it. It might take couple of months to put in place so might be tight but look at it this way if he pays £100 for 36 months that’s £3600 if you go cms and he pays £258 for 36 months that is £9288. Get what you’re entitled to!! It’s very easy for a dad to pay a measly amount and then claim he can only afford an extra £20…. Meanwhile mum is paying for a lot more than that but has no option to say I’m not paying for things we need

Thank you, I have said I will not accept £20 a month more, I went with a counter offer, he has not replied. I have processed an application through CMS.

It's just hit home how much maintenance and help towards my sons upbringing I could have had all these years