No contact yet again

[Newbegg]

Looking others thoughts on this. Almost separated one year from DH. We have barely spoke, mostly messages, so I can't really ask him straight and everything gets turned around and it's all my doing, anyhow.... Issue is..... Two teenagers and the contact is not great, without going into great details, 17 DC gets very little communication, the odd text & meet maybe once a month. DC accepts this. But the younger, 14, who is more, I suppose needing/missing their dad. Several times now he just doesn't stick to the day he's meant to collect. (just to add they go from week to week with barely texts and no phonecalls either), no explanation to DC, then just arranges the following week...(I hear nothing either) Surely to even text or call would be better than DC just saying to me, haven't heard from dad so probably not going out....I suggested we go out instead, but DC not interested or even the next day, still no!!.... I'm really looking to see how others deal with this. My DC won't text his dad to ask about their usual meet up. Would you? My heart hurts for DC when it seems dad just doesn't care enough.....

Did you have a bad break up? Is your ex in a new relationship that could be influencing their behaviour? Have you and ex had a frank talk about their behavior and how it’s affecting children?

I would try to find someone for your younger son to talk to. He needs a professional who will be neutral and can possibly give him some coping strategies as there most likely a lot of big complex emotions that he is struggling with. I’m not sure if school counsellors are a thing where you are but in DD’s last school most of the kids seeing the counselling team were dealing with separated parent issues.

@Flatandhappy @outthereandbeyond thanks for replying....it really depends on his mood in how he responds to me, although regarding kids, he's normally ok. I spoke with DC today and DC not overly fussed on it, wouldn't say anything negative towards his dad, so I'm glad it's not bothering DC at this time. I just left it there. DC won't talk about the separation and me bringing it up annoys DC so I haven't brought it up in months, so to involve the school, would not go down too well. I know my DC and I don't think I need to involve any professional bodies to help (at present).