Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

A whole mess I need help with

1 reply

Mybrainhurts247 · 22/09/2024 22:02

Hi so I left relationship when pregnant due to DV and got a non mol and he isn’t on birth cert . Bio dad never met my kid nor showed any iNterest (have written statement from non mol hearing saying he doesn’t want anything to do with child). Never paid a penny either not that I ever asked as I don’t want anything from him and done fine on my own.

he’s now taking me to court for PR, child contact and prohibited steps against me making certain choices! Also accused of being the abuser but not mentioned to cafcass or court he has had a non mol. I’m also going through some very difficult times with a terminal illness in the family which he knows of due to stalking social media.

im petrified of what might happen. I have an amazing team behind me helping me IDVA and legal but doesn’t help put my mind at rest. Legal have said this is coming across as further abuse due to the fact he’s lied to the courts already and withheld info. They’ve also said as my little one is so little and father has had no input since I left he probably won’t get everything due to the fact he knows nothing about my child and it’s further control but he could get contact but because this is so rare they don’t know how the contact will go they expect supervised in contact centre.

I have called cafcass and told them that he actually had a non mol and I fled domestic abuse and our officer sounded shocked especially when I told them there was a fact finding and it all got proven. I have a proper call with them coming up for the safeguarding letter.

so my questions are:
will a court grant everything he’s asked for?
will my child have to go to contact with him?
If so how would this work as he’s almost 2 and this would freak him out as we have such a close bond and he doesn’t cope with strangers or change well?
will the proven abuse account for anything as I was pregnant when abused and there has been no contact since?
will he get that control over me when coercive control has been proven in non mol?

also in the event my family issues turn and they pass which is probably going to happen soon but it is just before a court date will I still have to attend whilst dealing with grief?

please any help will be much appreciated as this is one stressed out mummy!

OP posts:
Frith2013 · 23/09/2024 18:25

I'm sorry that I cannot help you with legal advice. My ex took me to court (on and off) for 8 years and ended up with contact centre on Saturdays, then teatimes twice a week then every other weekend.

It all fell apart due to his behaviour after a few years and he has chosen not to see his children for the past 7 years or so.

I went to a women's refuge but (this was years ago) I did not get a non-mol or speak to the police.

I'm sorry to hear about the terminal illness. I was in court against my ex and another court date was set. The solicitors had discussed it and it was going to be the following week, on the day of my grandma's funeral. I must admit I burst into tears at the news and it was changed to a different day. I don't know how common it is to be able to change the day.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page