Grey rock and other options

[Sunsparkles]

I have a particularly difficult ex, I keep hearing about a "grey rock" method and other similar ways to respond, or I guess not, but I'm looking for some examples and other options from anyone with experience please.

We already don't speak in person, communicating only over email and occasionally WhatsApp when a quick update/response is needed.

Thanks ☺️

I see it as being neutral and unmovable in my responses. Eg he sent an inflammatory email last night about how I'd 'stopped' DC1 from going with him (DC is 14 and refuses to go with him at all -because ExH is horrible to DC- )
My reply is either nothing to emails like this or sometimes

Noted

Or

Your opinion is noted

If I responded how I'd like to; 'well you were unpleasant to DC so what do you expect' etc then he finds more fuel to latch on to and argue about.

It's a special way of saying your mum's old saying of 'ignore them and they'll go away' 😂

Ha ha, thanks I like that - unfortunately him going away isn't going to happen any time soon, he's going to hang around just enough to be annoying and not enough to actually benefit the kids 🤦

I do try to do the limited replies or ignore. It's so hard to balance though so as not to trigger him to be even more difficult 🫤

Also delay any necessary responses by at least a few hours as that slows the drama down, since the lack of immediate response will bore him. If you can wait until the next day that’s even better.

You can also copy and paste his email into ChatGPT, then ask it write a brief, unemotional one sentence reply to shut the argument down.

It took a long time but grey rock did work. My ex craved conflict and the key was to bore him and not provide an immediate response.

Ooo Chatgpt is a great shout! Can't believe I didn't think of that 🤦 I do leave responses at least 24hrs, or draft then delay sending. It's so exhausting having to temper my replies every time to try to not trigger unintentionally, especially as it often doesn't work no matter how unemotional my responses are, in fact sometimes I think that triggers him more 🫤