Do I keep the baby?

[trainwreckwendy]

I'm 41. Divorced. Main reason behind divorce was that our relationship failed due to our inability to conceive (he had a child from a previous relationship so assumed it was me with the issue - we didn't get to any investigations, so I assumed that too). I have always wanted a family. I have been heartbroken to say the least. A colleague/friend and I slept together after a work thing at the end of April. There was no spark. We've agreed we are just friends. I took the MA pill. You know the next bit...

Putting aside the awkward fact that it's a friend's baby/he needs to know/how will he feel, I need to first know how I feel. I need to assume he will want nothing to do with it so I know I could go it alone...

I'm so torn - I've always wanted to be a parent, but how on earth do people manage totally on their own? I have good friends here but they're all in 2.4 families. I have lovely but ageing and far away parents. I still rent! I am employed (and fairly well) but it's a busy job! I do not know if I am up to this. Please help!

Interesting maths - pregnant at 41 and teenager in your 70s 😂

What a ridiculous response, starting with your inability to do basic maths. 41 + 18 is 59, so I don’t know how OP would have a pre teen in her 60’s. You have no idea that the father wouldn’t be a good father, you’ve just made that assumption and decided OP is ‘depriving’ her child of one.
OP - if you’ve always wanted to be a mum - this is your shot. It may not be the way you intended it but you have a job to support you and baby, time to build support network, and you want the baby. It’s a no brainer for me.

Make sure you start taking folic acid to help spinal cord development.
when baby is due get a doula to help with birth and getting baby into a routine

@Loubelle70 what did I say that was wrong?

@phoenixbiscuits

In many ways, it's easier to be a lone parent, than a person in an abusive relationship.

Amen to that! I'm living testimony to that.

OP, your life changes (obviously!) as a single parent. You will meet and befriend other single parents.
I'm still friends with four of them 30+ years on.