Difficult ex / belief in conspiracy theories

[Dollenganger333]

My ex upset our 4 year old daughter a while back by telling her that when you see clouds in the sky, it’s because the government is spraying chemicals to harm people.

When she came home I said ‘don’t worry, it’s just condensation from the planes’ . She’s an anxious child (probably on the autistic spectrum) and I told her that adults don’t agree about everything and that’s ok.

Last weekend though, she came home and cried to me that her dad had been telling her I’m wrong.

i asked him to stop talking to her about it because, even if it were true it’s making her anxious. His reply to me is that I’m the one that is lying to her and it’s my problem.

Anyone else have a situation like this? He is difficult about everything and it’s draining. I never say negative things about him to dd and I hope she doesn’t end up cutting him off like his adult daughter has done.

Honestly what you're describing is bordering on emotional abuse of your daughter. Sounds like he's having mental health/paranoia issues and it's grossly unfair of him to pass such disinformation on to an already anxious child of 4. Your daughter could become very confused here and her father is seriously undermining you by telling her you're wrong.

There are a lot of online resources about how to support/avoid/engage/disengage with these people. Try googling "co parenting with a conspiracy theorist" or such like.

He has been like this since the pandemic when he started to believe all the Qanon stuff - at that time our daughter was a baby so luckily she was unaware of it. He definitely has poor mental health and always has had although he does also function surprisingly well in a work environment.

There is no easy answer to any of it really.

I feel your pain! I'm so sorry you're going through this. My ex left after having an affair in January, I didn't share their interests apparently, after 15 years together! Since the pandemic, they have been the same, started following conspiracies, and would get angry that I didn't want to listen to them, about their new beliefs. I never told him he was wrong or told him to not watch it, but just didn't engage with it. He believed the same with the planes and told her young child this too, That celebrities drink babie blood, the earth is flat, and we are being poisoned by toothpaste and water. He told our child that if you go to the Arctic and get to a certain point, the FBI stop you as there's land behind there and they don't want people to know about it. That government controls the weather! Honestly, I could list more. It is awful living with it and it would make me anxious. I believe with what the above person said, that it is a form of abuse, by them telling them what they believe, it is kind of like radicalisation and right-wing extremism.

They are a cult aren’t they?! They all say and do the same things.

I’m sorry you’ve experienced the same @BecksCookie - do you also have a child that you’re trying to coparent through this?

I think that telling her I’m wrong is parental alienation. Look, these are the kinds of texts he sends me. I’ve had enough of him - he’s being difficult about her primary school too. He is accusing me of lying to dd about chemtrails. I really think he needs help.

Oh gosh, ''bury your head in the sand'' I got the same comments. I truly understand and people can't begin to understand the stress it causes unless you've lived with it. Mine talked about buying weapons, that the government are going to make it so that we don't own anything but will be given what we need to live and will be happy with it. I can just imagine Lord and Lady Devonshire handing back their stately homes LOL. They needed someone to blame for COVID-19, this is a result of that. The utopian society that they think is coming was an MPs Ideal society, not what's going to happen, she said it with in mind what her ideal would be, nothing more, it got taken out of context and twisted. The government controlling the weather again was taken out of context when scientists created a device that controls vapor, they were asked by a reporter if it could control vapor, then it could potentially make clouds, and the scientists said yes, so this was twisted too. I feel sorry for them in a way, as they are being radicalised and they aren't even aware of it. They should not be putting these ideas into children's heads, and there should be more to protect children from this.

She's 4 years old? Ffs.

Tell him to stop having any - ridiculous adult type conversations with a small child.

@Whatineed I have told him many times but he won’t listen. What else can I do? This sounds awful but I wish I could take care of her by myself.