Oh OP, I’m constantly grappling with the mum guilt too. My situation is a little different as my son is only 2, but I can never shake the guilt of not being with him as much as I would like.
I’ve been raising him solo since day one and the plan originally was to only work part-time after my mat leave. Then came the COL crisis and my hours have steadily increased over the last year, and I’ve been full-time since January. I hate it. I hate that he’s so small and I’m missing so much. But I also hated the constant worry - the actual physical pain in my stomach when anything unexpected came up that I needed to pay for - of being on a lower income.
I’m counting down the days until the funded hours childcare kick in in September and will, hopefully, be reducing my hours at work then. I know that the years with being small are so fleeting, but I also know the stress and anxiety of worrying about money. I just feel like I can’t win. And, while I’m sorry to hear that you also feel this as the mum to a teen, I do take some comfort in knowing I’m not alone.
Can anything change in your circumstances,
do you think?
Sending solidarity. And thanks too for starting this thread.
Try and go easy on yourself. The worry means you care, and you’re doing what’s best for you and your son ❤️