Playing off against each other

[purpleme12]

How do you deal with this
I find it so upsetting
I know she'll tell her dad stuff like I'm late for school and say it's because mummy takes ages to get really detecting the blame from her.
So he'll say I need to get up earlier.
And it gives another reason to think I'm horrible.
Just find it so upsetting that I know she'll play me off against him more in the future as well. She's 10.
And he'll believe her cos he doesn't want to communicate with me.
I find it so upsetting how I deal with everything and beware the brunt of her attitude and behaviour but everything's ok for him because he deals with it less if at all.
And then all the things she's unhappy with will go back to him so he can empathise and be the good guy probably.
It's so upsetting

Sorry no experience of this as my kids dad isn't involved but does she also tell you things about him or is it all one sided?

She doesn't really tell me anything about him.
Unless it's good.

She doesn't live with him so he's seen as more of a novelty isn't he if you get me. More special. I have to put tell her what to do more (naturally as she spends more time with me)

I don't think I can compete with dad

I'm not cut out to be a mum
I thought I could do it but I'll never get close to her dad
I only put one for in front of the other.
I can hardly manage it