Put this in Aibu but didn’t get many responses so thought it might be better/ more suited here.
It’s my son’s birthday tomorrow, his father is absent and has no contact at all, entirely his choice. My son is turning 10, I was just saying how sad it is that his own father could ignore his child’s birthday, he didn’t even acknowledge him at Christmas but his own birthday is today so the day before our sons birthday and he just ignores it. I find it sad that a parent can be so cold and uninterested in their own child.
Well someone asked me if we send him a birthday card or anything like that and maybe he should start treating him how he wants to be treated?! Surely no one does this? If your ex isn’t involved do you send birthday cards from your child to their father? I’ve honestly never heard of anyone doing this and actually think it could be pretty upsetting for a child especially a horrible reminder that their father isn’t interested in them and then they will be likely expecting a response and not get one, actually seems quite cruel to me and not really the child’s place to do this, my son has never asked to send him a birthday card. Years ago when on better terms I use to get him Father’s Day cards and he actually asked me not to! Aibu to think no one sends a birthday card from their children to their absent parent? I’m not even sure if my son knows it’s his fathers birthday today as we’ve been split up years and we never spent a birthday with him so I’m not sure he is even aware and I wouldn’t want to upset him before his birthday by reminding him.
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Lone parents
Do you get absent parent a birthday card?
TuliLily · 09/03/2024 21:32
TuliLily · 09/03/2024 21:41
This was the comment, I was really surprised that anyone would think it is down to the child to treat someone how they want to be treated!
Flatleak · 10/03/2024 11:25
No of course not but equally, who would expect a birthday card from an absent parent?
TheFormidableMrsC · 10/03/2024 11:06
My ex has abandoned our son. It's been four years now. He immediately stopped gifts and cards and ignored our son's recent 13th birthday. His family are doing the same. So fuck all of them. There will be no cards, gifts or acknowledgment at all. I would not rake all of that up for my boy.
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