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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Older Mum of 4

2 replies

Muvva1981 · 09/03/2024 19:05

Hi everyone just wanted to introduce myself as it were .

I first became a mum at the age of 20 in 2002 when I had my daughter. I then had my first son Oct 2004, my second son Oct 2009 and my third son, my lockdown light 2020 baby. He was a BIG surprise .

Bit of back story. After my third baby and after a few years had passed I was getting a little bit of ‘me’ back if you get my meaning . My children were growing up , I found a job and I loved it . At the end of 2019 I was hard at work, the Christmas rush and I just didn’t realise I had skipped Novembers period. I was getting hot flushes , tired a lot, I genuinely believed I was starting the menopause ( I was 37) . Well the day before my 38th birthday I got a BIG surprise . I cried , shock, how would I cope and do this again? But with the support of my best friend and family I knew I could do it.

2020 rolled around , had a few appointments ( saw my 2009 midwife again and she remembered me) then lockdown hit. Appointments alone, it was a stressful time as I’m sure you’ll all agree. I was sent home from work on full contracted pay until my maternity leave started in the summer. Had my little man, his siblings are utterly besotted with him and I realised I’m actually still pretty good at being a mum. Don’t forget how to change a nappy that’s for sure :)

Circumstances changed and I had to leave my beloved job as I found myself single . It broke me. I cried . But my priority was my children .

Little man is now 3yrs old, he loves nursery. He’s on the ASD waiting list , he’s non verbal and he’s just the most loving happy boy. I do worry for his future with his emerging needs and especially for starting school in September, being a summer baby. I chose not to defer for a year as he gets a lot of support in nursery and it follows him into primary.

I guess I just wanted to say don’t don’t yourselves. I think we’re all guilty of second guessing our abilities as parents sometimes but know that you’re all amazing :)

Im the oldest mum at 42 at the nursery and I love it 😂

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Mairzydotes · 10/03/2024 09:00

Do people think he's your only child?
I had my first in my early 20s and my youngest in my late 30s . People are always surprised I have a teenager.

Muvva1981 · 10/03/2024 18:26

Mairzydotes · 10/03/2024 09:00

Do people think he's your only child?
I had my first in my early 20s and my youngest in my late 30s . People are always surprised I have a teenager.

A lot of the time yes. When my eldest takes him out he’s regularly mistaken for her son rather than her brother .
When I take little man on the bus I have this ability to just strike up conversations with everyone around me, I literally will talk to anyone. They ask how old he is and then the “ is he your only one?” Gets asked. When I say no, I’ve got 4 and reel off their ages I always get a shocked response .

I just respond with “He was a wonderful birthday surprise for me “ and he is . I’m constantly knackered but I wouldn’t change it for the world x

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